Why?
by Monica McWintorg
Summary: Three simple letters. Three of twenty six. Three that can ask either why it happened or why something couldn't have prevented it...
1. Why

Why?

Three simple letters. Three of twenty-six. Three that can ask either why it happened or why something couldn't have prevented it.

Why?

I have heard that question many times in the past three weeks. I have asked it many times myself. There is no easy answer, but then, I guess there never really are, are there?

Why did this happen?

Why couldn't I stop it?

Why didn't someone help?

Why do bad things have to happen to people I love?

Why do I ask questions to which I already know the answers?

I sit here now, holding the hand of a broken man. Yes, I can call him a man now. I don't find it awkward, because that is what he is, a man. He is no longer the child he was when I first met him. We were both children back then. Now he is seventeen, and my own seventeenth birthday is fast approaching. But it won't be the same. Not without him.

He is sleeping right now. Peacefully, one might think. A natural, comfortable, peaceful sleep. But that is as far from the truth as it gets.

This is an induced sleep. That has been the only thing that can be relied upon to stay the same these days and it has been just that – the same – for the past three weeks. If it hadn't been for the steaming purple liquid, I wouldn't be able to sit here, holding his hand in my own. I would never be able to touch him. That hurts.

He is only awake for a few hours each day now. During that time, when he is not lashing out at anyone who tries to come into physical contact with him, he is being forced to drink goblet upon goblet of antidotes and potions.

Life wasn't always like this though. Oh no, and it wasn't really that long ago either. But with every day that passes, it is getting harder and harder to remember those good times.

I'm beginning to miss all the little things, the touches, the easy conversations, the love. We had been dating for almost two years and, though we were never overly serious, we joked about what would happen after we'd finished school, the possibility of marriage. We joked, but I think we both were a tad serious. I couldn't (and still can't) imagine my life without him. I think he felt the same.

Our romance had been shaky when new. But once it found sturdy foundation and firmly rooted itself in the scarlet furnished tower, it flourished with passion and maturity surpassing all that was expected from the two of us. It had always been in the common room where we had spent the majority of our leisure time. Curled in front of the fire we would sit, wrapped in each other's embrace, watching.

We watched the love life of the muggle born Hermione Granger, and practically pure blood Ronald Weasley, take its first wobbly steps, then extend its stride into a swift and passionate lope. We also watched the famed Harry Potter flirt with death, and dance around the equally infamous Lord Voldemort.

When we were on the first leg of our long-term relationship, the two of us, together, had attended the meeting of the DA, or "Dumbledor's Army". We both excelled in the Defense Against the Dark Arts, but were left behind when Harry and a few others had faced the Dark Lord at the Department of Mysteries last summer. When we discovered the terrors and trials the others had faced, we were relieved to have been waiting at Hogwarts.

This year, our sixth year seemed too laid back, and happy to be true. Ever since starting at Hogwarts, something monumental and worthy of a history book of its own happened.

Many of the students, myself included, had been tense during the start of the first term, but relaxed, and enjoyed the peace. The Quidditch season began, and unlike the past five, we both tried our hand at the sport.

Most of the team had left Hogwarts, leaving half of the positions open. The competition was harsh, but I managed to take over Katie Bell's Chaser position. Ron stepped gracefully down from his Keeper position, and assumed the role of chaser, taking after Angelina Johnson. Much to his surprise, and both our delight, Seamus took over Ron's spot as Keeper.

The two of us flew together. I watched him soar around the hoops, defending them from the quaffles we threw at him during practices. I think he let me get a few in on purpose, but he almost always made the saves.

During the second seasonal game, my heart dropped to the pitch floor, and shattered into a million and one pieces as I watched a stray bludger fly towards then strike Seamus's foot, snapping his ankle on the spot. I would have gone to him right then, were it not for the brave and determined expression he put on his face when he turned to me and smiled. I could see the pain in his eyes, but seconds after, he dove and made a superb save. Renewed with vigor, I scored many, ruthless goals.

We won. I could barely think of celebrating. Instead of landing in a heap with the other chasers, I dove straight for Seamus. My eyes were blurry, and I almost ploughed him over with a hug. Madam Pomfrey fixed his foot in a hurry, but still ordered him to spend a night in the hospital wing. What I wouldn't give for this to be as minor as things were then.

Speaking of Madam Pomfrey, I hear her coming down the stairs from her office right now.

"Why are you still here dear?" She asks softly, a tone not often heard by students. She has grown accustom to me being here at all hours, whenever I am not in class or at Quidditch practice, I am always here.

"I just wanted him to know I'm here," I reply. Madam Pomfrey nods, knowingly, but when she turns her back I hear her muttering about how I might as well talk, (for I so often do) to the small table beside his bed, laden with cards, sweets and flowers, for all the good it will do.

I know this of course and smile as though I had heard nothing as she hands me a tube of lotion. After checking on Seamus, she puts up partitions to give us some privacy.

I have been through this routine before. I want to be as involved in Seamus's recovery as I possibly can. I have been told by many of the healers that have come in that I shouldn't get my hopes up, and that he may never come back to me mentally, but I have to defy them. A wise person had told me that sometimes, in times like these, our hope is the only thing we have to hold on to. I believed her, because she is the only one who understands what I am going through. She is after all Seamus's mother.

I roll up my sleeves; push back the bedclothes at the foot of the bed and after gingerly lifting his feet I sit on the bed, laying them on my lap. I read the lotion tube, for the millionth time. 'Apply this soothing lotion, two to three times daily for relief of scorches scars and burns.'

Squeezing out a small amount of the lotion into the palm of my left hand, I scoop up some of the white slippery film with my right middle finger and rub all my fingers together, smearing the chamomile scented stuff all over them. Now I begin to massage the lotion into the bottom of his feet. Starting at the heel, I work small counter-clockwise circles, I will slowly work my way over his arch, then make my way to the ball of his foot, eventually ending with his toes. After all that , I will switch to his other foot. But for now, I focus on his heel.

Most of the burns have healed. I am told that the scarring will be permanent. But there were spots that needed closer attention, and the healers believed the reason for his outbursts was because of physical pain. They are very smart people, and they help a lot, but I haven't the heart to tell them that the pain would only be half of it. But then, like I said, they are smart. Maybe they are just trying not to mention that other side of things.

I shudder, taking up more of the film, what kind of sick person could do this. Then I remember, they were not just people, they were the servants of the Dark Lord, Death Eaters, one or a group, they haven't told me. All they will tell me is to be strong. What do they think I am? Of course I will be strong, the last thing I need right now is pity.

Hearing shouts of laughter floating in with the suns fading rays through the open window beside Seamus's bed, I remember back to the day it happened.


	2. It All Began

Chapter Two _It all began… _

The brief spring break was drawing to a close and unlike many students, Seamus and I were making the most of the last ounce of sunlight left over from the abnormally warm day. The early March vacation had been primarily sunny, except for two rainy days. This meant the grass of the school grounds was trampled by the many feet that had trodden there.

I sat on the cool ground under a large oak tree overlooking the lake. Wand in hand, I was practicing charming the near by dead leaves to float several feet into the air, then land in a neat pile one on top of the other, on top of the other, on top of the other... I eventually had a pile that was taller than me while sitting.

Losing interest fast, I brushed the pile over with a sweep of my hand and instead, turned my attention to Seamus. His slim figure was outlined by the last rays of sunlight peaking over the great hills of the horizon; a cool night was fast approaching.

Seamus stood at the edge of the lake, the sleeves of his robes were drawn back to his elbows and in one hand he clutched a number of carefully selected stones, each rather smooth, flat. He would take up one, holding it between his middle finger and thumb, with his index finger used to balance, then with an expert flick; he sent each one skipping along the surface of the water. One, two, three and sometimes four jumps, before disappearing with a small 'gloop'.

Holding my wand up, I pointed it at the back of his neck. I watched, mildly entertained as his hood lifted slowly. He looked back at me, but I had already dropped my wand. I smiled at him and he returned an amused lopsided smile.

_I look up at his sleeping face, a slight frown on his lips. I wonder if I will ever see him smile at me in that easy way again. I wonder if I will ever see him smile again. _

He had turned his attention back to skipping stones and I turned my wand back on him. This time, I successfully brought his hood up and onto his head.

He made no move to look at me, so I stood up and went over to him. Hearing my approach, Seamus turned slightly and wrapped his arm around my waist, but still he continued to throw the rocks until all the stones were spent. People always told us we made a cute pair. This of course is because of our fairy tale height difference. Seamus had been rather short in the first four years at Hogwarts, but after the summer leading up to our fifth year, he has been about a foot taller than me.

He turned to me and I pushed back his hood. He bent his neck and kissed me, lightly at first, but then more deeply and passionately. My heart fluttered as it always did when he was around. He played gently with the hair on the nape of my neck, twirling it around his fingers, sending jolting shivers up and down my spine.

This moment was quite uncommon between the two of us. We were usually accompanied by Neville Longbottom and Dean Thomas, Seamus's best mates. Not that I minded the others. They are great guys, really funny, but I personally prefer privacy for the two of us. Seamus was shy, and wasn't particularly into the whole public-display-of-intimacy thing. I never cared who saw us together, as long as I was with Seamus.

_Closing my eyes, I touch my lips lightly with my only lotion free digits, my left middle and ring fingers. Thinking back, I can still remember the feel of that kiss. Tears well up in my eyes, and I think 'that was our last kiss' pushing back that unhappy thought, I force myself to be positive. He will be back. _

Our foreheads were now pressed against the others. I looking up and Seamus, bending his neck looked down at me. I smiled at our closeness as he searched my eyes with a small smile. Seamus had always been rather quiet, and thoughtful, talking not just because, but when he had something to say. That's what had always made our silences comfortable, just like then. It did not take long for me to get lost in the deep blue pools before me that were his eyes.

I broke the sentimental moment by opening my mouth and yawning widely. He'd smiled down at me, brushed, not pressed, brushed his lips across mine and said with a gentle nod of his head, "Go on to bed."

I had smiled, nodded and after squeezing his arm lightly, walked by myself across the grounds, up the stone walk way and up the wide staircase leading up to the castle

Before passing through the tall wooden doors to the Entrance Hall I turned back and saw Seamus sit down in a rolling motion under the same tree where I had sat. His knees were bent, his arms wrapped loosely around them. I saw his silhouette blend with that of the tree when the sun finally disappeared behind the horizon. I smiled and, not for the first time, wondered what was happening in his head.

_'That was the last time I saw him.' I think, rubbing in the last of the lotion. Bending his knees slightly, I move up to them, taking more lotion, I begin to massage it into the backs of his knees as I had done to his feet. Why would anyone want to do this? _

It was not until the next day that I'd found out Seamus had disappeared.

Hermione, Parvati Patil, and Lavender Brown were all sitting with me at our house table for lunch. I was relatively unconcerned that I hadn't seen Seamus all day. Dean Thomas said he hadn't been in the common room all night, but even that didn't overly faze me. Seamus had mentioned a stomach pain the day prior, and I thought he may have gone up to the hospital wing like I had suggested. The other girls and I sat discussing the Care of Magical Creatures class we had just come from. Draco Malfoy, a Slytherin, had been searching frantically through the entire class for the Ashwinder he and his partner Pansy Parkinson were supposed to be watching. It had escaped, and after finding the ashy remains of the serpent like creature, the two had to find its fiery clutch of eggs, before they set the entire grounds on fire.

Professor McGonagall came from outside the hall, and stopped directly behind us. We had all stopped talking, knowing that it irritated teachers when we talked about our fellow students behind their backs. I turned to the professor and she was looking straight at me.

"Have you seen Mr. Finnigan today?" She asked, directing her question at me.

"No," I answered. "I thought he would be in the hospital wing, I was just about to go see him." I realized this was the answer she'd feared. Her face clouded over and she gestured for me to come with her. With an anxious look back at my friends I followed.

"Is anything the matter Professor?" I asked as we walked up the marble staircase.

"Professor Dumbledore will want to speak with you." She answered, as she looked back at me I found a very frightening expression on her face.

It was not though the expression itself was particularly frightening, but the context behind the look. It was one that until now I had thought was solely meant for Harry Potter. A kind of mix between the remorseful look all parents give him and an almost motherly expression. I suspect the motherly expression was because she herself has no family of her own and being that I am a muggle-born, she may have found me to seem a vulnerable child. I was shocked when I saw this expression when she looked at me, but not near as shocked as when she put her arm around my shoulder.

I recognized the gesture immediately. I myself had used it on several too many occasions, like when Lavender Brown's bunny died. I'd done the same to Ravenclaw's Cho Chang when her boyfriend Cedric Diggory met his untimely end. I'd even done the same for Harry Potter when the only remaining link to his parents, his godfather had died last year. When this gesture registered, I stopped.

"Where's Seamus?" I demanded, just barely maintaining my polite composure while talking to the professor.

"Its better we wait until you've seen Professor Dumbledore." Professor McGonagall said, putting slight pressure on my shoulders, urging me to continue walking. I didn't.

"Where is Seamus?" I repeated, drawing myself away from her kind embrace. "I can't go until I know."

"Well dear," Again that look, she called me _dear_... "We really don't know where he is. He's missing."

In the muggle world, fear sets in now, but I was already way past fear. My legs seemingly disappeared from beneath me and I staggered against a wall, sliding down it. I sat on the floor, staring at the opposite wall, raking my fingers through and pulling at my hair. I had all the reason to be afraid. Though I believe it may be too late to say that I don't take well to these kinds of situations.

There were a number of reasons that I was in this state. One was that I had just been with him the entire day before and it set in early for me that I won't be seeing him... for a long while. I also knew that this isn't one of the common muggle 'lost child' scenarios where he just has to hug a tree, and he will be found eventually. He must have been really lost if I was being taken to Dumbledore. But the primary reason for my distress was that the wizarding world was – and is – at war. Good against Evil if you will, and being that we are on the good side, the possibilities of who took him were drastically narrow.

"Come now girl," Professor McGonagall said; her hand under my elbow. "We have to go before someone" She was cut off by a loud booming bell signaling the end of lunch, ten minutes until class started. Professor McGonagall abandoned me and went to head off the hundreds of footsteps headed our way.

Suddenly Professor Dumbledore was there. He was bending down and his face appeared in my sight path. I hadn't heard him approach.

"Come now," He said, placing his hand on my arm. "We have to be strong for Mr. Finnigan. We need to find him before anything bad happens to him." I'd looked up at him, nodded with a swallow, allowed him to help me up and followed him to his office.

I normally would have inspected a new room thoroughly with a quick but observant glance, but under the circumstances, I only noticed the round ceiling lined with portraits, and a large bird perched beside the professor's desk. The people in the frames had been talking, but stopped when we entered.

Gathering myself, I told Professor Dumbledore everything about the last week I had been with Seamus. Where we'd been, what we'd done, who we'd talked with. Through my entire account, the Headmaster was quiet, nodding while watching me over his half moon glasses. He was kind, wise, and waited until I had collected myself. When he did finally speak, his voice was brisk, though it still held compassion, it made me relax slightly.

"I must send some immediate owls. You are welcome to stay here as long as you wish," He pulled some rolls of parchment and what looked like a small mirror from his desk. "You aren't required to attend your afternoon classes. If you would prefer, Madam Pomfrey will allow you a bed in the hospital wing if you prefer some solitude," He nodded solemnly, gathered his mirror and parchment, and left, pausing only to stroke the bird.

I sat for an indefinite amount of time, watching the fire in the large stone fireplace. The flames licked and jumped at something that seemed just out of reach, never quite getting it, but never giving up. I heard the thunder of hundreds of feet, and realized that the day was over, and it was supper. I wasn't hungry, I felt more ill than anything.

I looked up and discovered that the professor's bird was watching me. It hopped from its golden perch to the back, then arm or my chair.

"Hello there birdie." Said a voice, it couldn't have been my own, because that voice sounded too cheerful and normal. I reached up and stroked the animal's silky smooth feathers. Judging by its size, scarlet feathers, and golden points, the bird was a phoenix. Trust the headmaster to have such an exotic bird.

I have always excelled greatly in my Herbology and Care of Magical Creature classes. I hope to, after Hogwarts, study in the field of Magizoology or Herbology at the Ministry of Magic. I've considered coming back to Hogwarts to teach Care of Magical Creatures, but decided to gain some experience before pursuing that thought.

The bird crooned softly, and rested its head against my shoulder much like a dog would when you stroke it. I marveled at being this close to the animal, knowing full well that the Ministry of Magic classified phoenixes among the second most dangerous creatures. This is only so because it takes a very skilled wizard or witch to domesticate them.

Hearing whispers overhead, I notice that the portraits are conversing again.

I looked up, and realized, judging by all the name plates on the frames that they were all past headmasters or mistresses of Hogwarts.

One specific portrait caught my eye. A witch. Her frame read 'Deloris Quigglebe'. She held my gaze for a moment, then turned to the frame beside her own.

"Poor thing," She whispered. "She doesn't know..." Her voice trailed as she realized I was watching.

"What don't I know?" I asked. All the other portraits quieted, watching myself and the portrait of the lady.

"Well..." Deloris was a bit ruffled at being singled out. "Your sweetheart's gone missing."

"I've gathered as much," I said in an irritated tone.

"You didn't let me finish," The woman said straightening up in her frame. "He didn't just get lost on his way to his dormitory last night; he didn't even make it as far as the castle."

"How do you--?" I started.

"Know?" Asked the woman, "Most all of the portraits in the school know by now. Smith here just informed us all." She gestured to the extra wizard in the frame next to her own. A wizard with long blonde hair and the most colorful robes I'd ever seen shook his head violently, and rushed past the frame and out of sight.

"How do you know? What do you know? Where's Seamus?" I asked, all these questions spilling from my mouth uncontrollably.

"Sir Cadogan, the tactless git," Answered the lady, adding the last bit under her breath, earning her nods and mutters of agreement from the other portraits who were now intent on listening. "Sir Cadogan was down in the Charms corridor, lurking about as he always does, when he looked out the window that was across the hall from his frame. He saw a scuffle down by the lake, so being as _inquisitive_ as he is; he clanked from frame to frame until he had a better view."

"What did he see?" I asked, standing up, and walking over, stopping just below the woman's portrait.

"Well like I said he saw a scuffle, but after a bit, young Finnigan got hit with a stunner and was disillusioned."

"Who was it?" I asked loudly, well over my normal volume. "Who hit him? Where did he take Seamus?"

"Cadogan didn't see the other's face, said he was all in black, and that his face was covered the whole time," The witch answered. "But every one knows who it is."

"Who took Seamus?" I repeated, my voice quivering with fear of what she was sure to say.

"One of You-Know-Who's lot," Answered the witch after a sideways glance at her colleagues. "A Death Eater."


	3. Mother

Chapter Three _Mother_

Dear Lavena, Wednesday, April 20th

I'm sorry it's been so long since I last wrote. There's nothing wrong, I've just been awful busy, No worries! Too much homework and quidditch practice, I don't see how you could have done it when you were here.

Seamus is fine, don't worry.. He still gets upset when he's awake, but he's getting better every day.. In fact, yesterday, he actually **willingly** swallowed five of the potions! I know that you asked for me to tell you of any news, so there it is. I do have some bad news though. The open wound on his chest has become infected. Don't worry, it's nothing Madam Pomfrey can't handle, it's just that she can't treat it with magic just now because of all the potions and such that he is being given at the moment. The infection had given him a bit of a fever lately, but I'm helping out as much as I can, so in my professional opinion, I can safely say that he is over the worst, just as long as he doesn't over exert himself. I guess aside from him waking up, we don't really have to worry about that.

My classes are fine; Hagrid (my Care of Magical Creatures professor) says every day that he can't wait until Seamus is back. That was always his best class. Professor Sprout says that she hopes that he will be back into action before the end of the year because she had made the end assignment especially for him and Neville but shush, I wasn't suppose to tell anyone. It's going to be centered around mimbulus mimbletonias. I'm really looking forward to it, I know Neville is too (He'll do really well on it), but it's kind of a sad anticipation. Every Herbology class, I look over at Seamus's empty place, and hope to the gods that he comes back soon. Things are so different without him. But like you said, stay positive.

I know I've asked this in almost every letter, but you never answer me. I'm wondering if you could please, PLEASE tell me what it is that everyone else knows about what happened to Seamus when he was gone. I know that you know, so you can't lie to me. Everyone keeps telling me that I'm not old enough; I wouldn't be able to handle it. But I know I could. I've had to handle a lot in the past few weeks, and you know it, but to be able to handle more, I need to know what happened. Besides, what's all this about not being old enough? My birthday's passed, I'm of age, how much older does everyone want me to get?

I guess I should end this letter, I'm supposed to be writing an essay on my crup for Professor Hagrid, and I haven't even started yet.

I hope this letter finds you well, give my love to Brian. Write back soon, I'll keep you posted.

Elizabeth Thornburn


	4. I'd Rather be Dreaming than Living

Chapter Four _I'd Rather Be Dreaming Than Living…_

Aspirations, longing for, trance, abstraction, reverie. Ideas, emotions, sensations and series of images.

There are certain things that should linger in the dream world and others that should never enter there. What ever be the will of the unconscious being, things never remain the way you want them to.

Seamus wrapped his arm around her waist, but continued to throw the rocks until all the stones were at the bottom of the lake. He then turned to Elizabeth as she pushed back his hood; her hand traveled down to rest on his shoulder, the other held his upper arm. He bent his neck and kissed her, lightly at first, but then more deeply and passionately. He played gently with the hair on the nape of her neck; twirling it around his fingers, sending jolting shivers up and down her spine, his other hand kneaded her lower back with gentle pressure.

Their foreheads were pressed against each others. Elizabeth looked up, and Seamus, bending his neck, looked down at her. She smiled at their closeness, as he searched her eyes with a small smile, his hand caressing her jaw. It did not take long for her to get lost in the deep blue pools that were his eyes.

The moment passed as the sun sank beneath the hilly horizon, and hand in hand the two walked up to the castle, through the vacant corridors and up to the deserted Gryffindor common room. Seamus lingered at the bottom of the girl's dormitory staircase, holding Elizabeth close to him, trying as hard as he could to ward off the inevitable goodnight. Elizabeth played with the material of his robes, feeling his sweet breath wash over her.

"I'd best be getting to bed." Elizabeth said softly after a few minutes. She pulled back, though still in his arms.

"Couldn't we just…" Seamus searched for a word. "Crash here tonight?" he nodded towards the red furniture surrounding the waning fire. The warm orange glow cast upon the couches by the coals gave them a comfortable, inviting look, making Elizabeth feel even more tired.

Elizabeth just smiled. "Seamus we can't." Her eye lids drooped, "Look at me; I can barely keep my eyes open. I'll be a wreck tomorrow if I don't go to bed soon." She leaned forwards and rested her head against his chest. Seamus held her head in place with his hand, resting his chin on it rocking gently back and forth; he kissed the top of her head protectively.

Elizabeth breathed in the familiar scent of soap mixed with his faint cologne. Before the warm blanket of sleep enveloped her, she snapped her eyes open and rolled her head up.

Seamus's lips brushed hers. "Goodnight then." He whispered, his voice was pained, and he watched her walk towards the first stair.

Elizabeth shuffled up the spiral staircase to her dormitory, leaving Seamus to gaze after her.

She was greeted by Parvati's light snoring and Lavender's deep, rhythmic breathing. Hermione sat cross legged on her bed; her time table perched on one knee, a stack of books piled precariously on the mattress beside her.

"I shouldn't have left it to the last minute." She smiled. And went back to putting tabs into one of the books, marking out where new chapters started. "I don't really want to sound like the nasty prefect," She added without looking up. "But you two shouldn't have been out for so long."

"We were just taking advantage of the last bit of the break." Elizabeth yawned, tossing her robes onto her chair, and putting on her pajamas. She sighed, "Back to classes, this week went by too quickly."

"I know what you mean." Hermione agreed. "I haven't gotten to do half of the studying that I'd wanted to." She read an incantation from one of the books and with a flick of her want, a tray of tea and biscuits appeared from nowhere, then she made it disappear. Smiling at her accomplishment, she put the books on the floor beside her book bag, and changed into her night gown.

Elizabeth crawled under her bedclothes and blew out the candle on her bedside table. "Night." She said to Hermione who was crawling into her own bed.

"Goodnight." Hermione said, blowing out her candle, throwing the dormitory into darkness.

Elizabeth woke with a start.

_Had it been a dream?_ She was indeed laying in her bed in the dark dormitory, but what had happened in order for her to get there?

Crawling from under the covers, she lit a small candle threw on her dressing gown and slipped out of the dormitory. Hurrying down the stairs, she wondered how she was to convince herself that it wasn't a dream.

By the time she'd reached to common room, Elizabeth decided that she would go to the hospital wing to see.

Climbing silently from the portrait hole, Elizabeth saw that The Fat Lady wasn't there. She briskly made her way to the hospital wing without any interruption. She stole into hospital, heart sinking as she saw the partitions. Emerging around the screens, she sighed deep and sat on the edge of the bed.

"It was just a dream." She said aloud to the sleeping Seamus.

Placing the candle on his bedside table, Elizabeth hunched over and covered her eyes with her palms.

Silent tears rolled from her eyes. She knew that the dream was too good to be true. It was so vivid, she wished she would have stayed in the common room and slept on the couch with him. She was sure that she wouldn't have believed that it was real had she done that in her dream.

She reached her hand out and wrapped her fingers around Seamus's._ If only I had insisted on him coming up to the castle with me that night. Then none of this would have happened._

Her shoulders shook as she tried to regain her composure. _I've got to get back up to bed._ But she couldn't move, she didn't want to leave Seamus. The sound of footfall brought her face up from her hands.

"Miss Thornburn! What are you doing here, its past midnight." Madam Pomfrey came around the partitions, and stopped at the sight of the girl. Her expression softened as she saw Elizabeth's tear streaked cheeks. "What's this all about?"

"It was just a dream." Elizabeth said, her exasperated voice trembling. She wiped her tears on the sleeve of her robe and looked down at Seamus. His chest rose and fell softly with each breath. "I guess I just have to be more patient."

"If you're alright, you should be off to bed." The matron said coming over and checking Seamus.

Elizabeth watched for a moment then bent over Seamus and kissed his cheek. "I'll be back this afternoon." She whispered.

Picking up her candle, she headed for Gryffindor tower. As she rounded the corner to the Fat Lady's portrait, a movement ahead caught her eye. Thinking it was Mr. Filch, the caretaker, she shrank into the shadows of a suit of armor.

Watching the figure draw near, she realized that it was a student. Not just any student, it was…

"Neville what are you doing?" Elizabeth asked, emerging from the shadows.

Neville, after jumping about a foot in the air, looked wildly around for who said his name, wand out. He turned to Elizabeth and, fortunately for her, recognized it was her before raising his wand.

"Sorry." He muttered stowing his wand in the pocket of his robes. "Why are you out here?"

"Not fair, I asked first." Elizabeth said, leaning against the cold stone wall.

"I think we both know why we're out here." Neville sighed, leaning next to Elizabeth. "I was just going to see him." His voice sounded tired. Elizabeth couldn't help but notice how much he had matured since the duel at the Department of Mysteries last year.

"Yah," Elizabeth exhaled deeply. "I just got back. You know, I had this brilliant dream that he came up to the castle with me that night. Do you ever wish you could just go back in time and warn yourself about something?"

"All the time." Neville nodded.

"So how often have you been doing this?"

"Doing what?" Neville asked, feigning confusion.

"Going to see him in the dead of night." Elizabeth finished.

"Too long," Neville shook his head. "Almost since he came back. Why did they bring him here?" He caught the shocked expression on Elizabeth's face. "Not meaning that it's not nice having him close, but he'd almost be better off at St. Mungo's."

"Madam Pomfrey said they hope he's going to recover quickly, and be able to jump back into his classes." Elizabeth answered, wishing that it was that simple.

"I guess" Neville wasn't convinced, but before Elizabeth could come up with something better to say a nearby noise made her jump out of her skin.

"We'd better go back to bed." She whispered, turning to the portrait at the end of the corridor. Neville turned in the opposite direction. "Neville where are you going?" Elizabeth asked.

But Neville didn't say anything. He looked over his shoulder at her, put his index finger over his lips, and disappeared down the dim corridor, off in the direction Elizabeth had come from.


	5. Do You Remember Me?

Chapter Five _Do You Remember Me?  
_

It's only been a week since the dream but, as every one knows, patience is rewarded.

The final bell rings and, forgoing supper, I hurry along the corridors up to hospital. Seamus is still in the same place as usual. _He must be waking soon_, the potion cart is near.

Dropping my book bag outside the partitions; I sit on the bed, and while I perform my daily ritual of rubbing the lotion into his feet and legs, I talk to him. I tell him all about the classes. I know that this all falls on deaf ears because he is sleeping, but I still like to think that this will help him not to be so far behind in classes when he comes back. When I finish my task, I wipe my hands off on a towel, and take my seat on my chair at his bedside.

As I absentmindedly smooth my thumb over his cheek bone, _Rough…needs to be shaved in the morning, gosh men sure have to shave a lot…_, he mumbles something. I look around, wondering where Madam Pomfrey is because I know from the past that this means he will soon wake. _It's not as though I really need her. _I think (far more confidently than I really am). _I've helped with this loads of times before._ On the cart beside me are a number of potion bottles, I've made it my personal goal to know the use, purpose and dosage of each one. All I have to do is give him the right amount of each when he wakes up and he'll be fine. _I can handle this._

Seamus's words are not just mumbles now. He's starting to squirm; it looks like he's struggling against the bedclothes. He says "no" a lot… _I was being naïve to think I can handle this by myself. Maybe it's not too late to go get Madam Pomfrey._ Too late, Seamus's eyes just flashed open. _God, it's good to see those brilliant blues again. _

"No! --off, get off me…stay---way…" He struggled under the covers at those words, but he now lies still, looking around himself. He is breathing heavy, and had broken into a small sweat during his tussle. He doesn't know where he is, his eyes jump around the room like sparks. They stop, resting on me.

"Wh--Wh--- no… How did you--?" He isn't making much sense. I lean forwards, encouraging him and for once, he doesn't shy away. "Where am I?" He asks.

"You're at Hogwarts." I answer.

"Then none of it…" He tries to push himself, winces then falls back to the bed. Looking at his hands and arms, his eyes widen as they take in the burns and healing gashes that still cover them. There is still faint bruising around both his wrists. He has been mending rather quickly, but some injuries are taking longer than others. "I'm still here!" He exclaims, twisting violently.

"No, Seamus, you're back!" I reach out and touch the back of his hand. He freezes. He looks up at me, and suddenly his eyes are brimming with tears. _Seamus never cries._ He pulls his hand roughly from my grasp, and rolls over with his back to me.

Reaching out I touch his shoulder, caressing it lightly. He winces. Though he is covered to his armpits with the blankets, I know where almost every injury on his body is, and I know that my hand is not on any of them. _He hurts from human contact?_ I sit patiently, waiting for his tears to subside, humming a bit to myself, my hand still on his shoulder so he knows that I am here.

Rolling over to face me, Seamus's cheeks are streaked with tears, his eyes are red.

"You're back." I say again, this time more softly. Seamus, resembling a small child, nods. I wait a few moments before speaking. "There're a few potions you've got to take. Madam Pomfrey will be here in no time; perhaps we can surprise her by you having drunk them all?" I ask him this slowly, not sure if he will want to drink the sordid tasting liquids, but much to my surprise he nods, his eyes still swimming.

Reaching beside myself, I take up the first of the bottles. A clear pinkish potion pours into an empty goblet. Replacing the lid, I hold out the glass.

After staring at it for a moment, Seamus tries to push himself up against the pillows but he slumps back to them as a look of pain crosses his eyes the expression doesn't disappear.

I put my hand behind his head, resting my elbow on the bed; I support his head and bring the goblet to his mouth. It takes him a moment to bring up his hand, grasp the cupped portion of the glass and drink the liquid, his eyes remain fixed on mine over the goblet's rim.

I reach for the next potion, a murky orange and continue the same procedure for each of the eleven potions, leaving behind the purple sleeping draft. Finished, I begin to pull my arm from behind Seamus's head, but he quickly puts his hand on my arm stopping me. He fingers the hem of my robe sleeve for a moment before letting go.

"Tell me this is real." Seamus whispers in a broken voice. "…please. Tell me I'm not dreaming." His hand reaches up to touch my cheek, his fingers making a brushing action but he is unable to bring himself to make contact and drops it back to the bed.

I nod. Resting my elbow back on the bed, I put my other hand on his opposite shoulder, drawing him to me. He stiffens in my embrace, but after a moment, he relaxes, burying his face in my shoulder. I rest my chin on the top of his head, my tears mix with his sandy coloured hair. Seamus sobs against my shoulder and I can feel his tears wet my front. His hands reach up, and roam over my back coming to a rest on my shoulder blades; he grasps the material of my robes in his fist and shakes with every heart shattering sob.

I hold him to me, for how long, I do not know. It does take many minutes for his tears to subside, and even longer for him to collect himself enough to pull away from my shoulder. When he does, his hand comes up between us he reaches out to touch me but still, he can't bring himself to do so.

"It's alright." I reassure him with a nod.

He reaches his hand up again, centimeters from my face and closing in when the moment is broken by a voice that makes us both jump.

"I thought I'd bring you some OH MY GOODNESS!" Madam Pomfrey drops the tray she is carrying with a loud clatter. "He's awake!"

In that split second of the clatter, Seamus's face contorted with a mixture of fear and pain. I jump up as he clamps his hands over his ears, eyes rolling. He arches his back away from the bed sending pain shooting all over his body. In an attempt to lessen the pain, he slumps against the bed, more pain.

Rushing Madam Pomfrey from the partitioned area, I exhale deeply with disappointment at what I had _almost_ achieved.

"What happened?" Madam Pomfrey demands her eyes wide.

"He was fine." I explain. "He woke up and he was fine until you came in. I think it may have been the tray, maybe he isn't comfortable with more than one person…" I trail off as the sounds of Seamus thrashing against his bed drift through the screens.

"This is no good." Madam Pomfrey sighs in exasperation, "This isn't good for him, his body's already under enough strain from his injuries." Her eyes flash as she thinks of a solution.

"I could get him to take the sleeping draught." I suggest.

"That'll have to do." Madam Pomfrey agrees. "I'll come in once he's asleep, has he taken his potions?"

I nod. "All but the sleeping one."

She nods and smiles at me briefly. I suspect she realize the intimacy of the moment that she'd walked in on. I smile slightly, and return to Seamus's side.

He had stopped thrashing about, and now lay still though trembling under the sheets. I sit on my chair at his side, and he shies away.

"Oh Seamus, what did they do to you?" I ask softly with only a hint of the exasperation that I feel from being so blind to his torment.

To my surprise he answers with a snort of false laughter. "What didn't they do?"

I choose not to respond to this. I sit at his side for several moments as our presence fills the air.

"You ought to sleep; Madam Pomfrey is worried that you may have hurt yourself when…" I trail off as he gives me another tearful expression. "What?"

"Don't leave me---" He pleas. My heart clenches at the need in his voice.

"I've got to." I smile weakly, reaching beside me for the purple sleeping potion. "I've got to go to bed, I've class tomorrow." I pour a half a glass of the purple potion.

Seamus watches my movements with anxious eyes.

"Classes, remember? Tomorrow I've got Care of Magical Creatures, Charms, Herbology and then Defense Against the Dark Arts." I measure the liquid with the scale on the side of the glass. I check my watch to verify my measurements. _9:42, gosh it's later than I thought…_

"Yes." Seamus croaks.

"I'll come here tomorrow right after potions if you promise to drink all of this right now." I add a bit more potion then hold the glass out.

"You'll be here when I wake up?" Seamus's eyes lock onto mine, not even glancing at the goblet in my hand.

"I'll be here when you wake up." I confirm, finishing firmly, "I promise."

Seamus reluctantly nods, and wraps his fingers around the cupped portion of the goblet. One of his fingers brush mine and rest on the glass touching it. A muscle in his hand twitches, but he doesn't move his finger.

Propelling the glass towards his lips, I help tilt the cup as its entire contents pour into Seamus's mouth. He swallows it in two big gulps and eyes already drooping, Seamus settles himself against the soft pillows.

"See you tomorrow." I whisper.

"---tomorrow." His voice slurs as he drops off asleep.

Before his eyes are even completely closed Madam Pomfrey bustles around the corner of the screens. Immediately she puts the back of her hand to his forehead, then cheek.

"He's running a fever."

There is no need to tell me, there's a pinkish tint to his normally pale skin, and a slight sweat on his brow. Madam Pomfrey quickly pulls down the sheets that cover the motionless body.

Over the right side of his chest, Seamus has one of many injuries. It is covered at the moment with a gauze wrap, but with a swipe of her wand, Madam Pomfrey makes the gauze vanish and inspects the pink skin beneath.

When he had first arrived at St. Mungo's, there had been what looked like an overlarge paper cut on the upper right portion of his chest, about a hand's width below his collar bone. A rather large flap of skin had been seemingly shaved partially off and had to be skillfully removed by one of the hospital's healers. An infection developed within a week of his being brought to Hogwarts. Though it was healing fast, Seamus caused many backwards steps because he got too overexcited every time he woke, putting strain on his injuries, slowing his recovery.

"You should be in bed." Madam Pomfrey scolds, looking up at me briefly before turning her attention back to Seamus.

"I'll just go to bed." I say backing away from the bed.

"How much did you give him?" Madam Pomfrey asks.

"He'll wake up tomorrow, just after four." I answer, knowing that she is referring to the sleeping draught without her even saying so.

Madam Pomfrey looks up at me after applying some sort of liquid then a bandage to the wound. "You did very well."

I grin at the compliment but my smile disappears as she rolls him over to his side. My mouth dries instantly, I taste bile.

As he almost never leaves the bed except for linen exchange and to make changing the dressing on his wounds easier, there is no point in Seamus wearing excess clothes, I've gotten used to seeing him in only his boxer shorts.

The sight before my eyes, his back, though not foreign to me, is one that disgusts me above anything I've ever seen in my entire life. Turning my back to Madam Pomfrey I pick my book bag off the floor where I'd left it.

"I'll be back tomorrow before he wakes."

"You should eat something," Madam Pomfrey states, looking over briefly. "Go down to the kitchens before heading for your dormitory.

"I will." I say not looking over, making a beeline for the door.

Not feeling particularly hungry, I head up to Gryffindor tower stopping only to dash into one of the girl's toilets on the way and retch in a toilet, the image of Seamus's back and the injuries it held, still vivid in my mind.


	6. Seamus I Love You

Chapter Six_ Seamus… I Love You_

"Miss Thornburn! That's the third time I've had to tell you to stop talking." Professor Snape's cold voice cut through Elizabeth and Dean Thomas's whispered conversation in the next day's Defense Against the Dark Arts class. "Because you can't seem to keep your mouth shut, you can stay after class and help tidy up."

"But sir!" Elizabeth began to protest. "Seamus is--"

"Your little comatose can wait. I'm sure he won't be going anywhere fast anytime soon." Professor Snape said, a small smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. The Slytherins didn't even try to hide their snickers.

Elizabeth opened her mouth angrily but Dean put a warning hand on her arm at the same moment that the room exploded with shouts from both Ron Weasley and Harry Potter as the yelled at the professor.

The professor docked points from both of the boys and gave both a detention a piece. Elizabeth looked mournfully at the book before her; which held the incantation she should have been nonverbally practicing. Defeated.

As the final bell sounded, the Slytherins cleared their area (which for Elizabeth's convenience they'd left in a complete mess of not only strewn papers, but someone had managed to procure some sort of glue like substance that was stuck to the tables and floor in lumps that had hardened to the consistency of rocks.

"What am I going to do?" Elizabeth groaned, throwing her book into her bag as the class emptied. Dean lingered behind, clearing off his own desk at a snail's pace. "Seamus is going to wake up in ten minutes-" Professor Snape retreated to his office with a small huff. "-and just look at what those vile Slytherins did!"

She pointed to the grayish green rocks that were cemented to the class floor, and a number of the desks. Worse still, they appeared to be expanding. Elizabeth knew that even with her sturdy scouring charm, it would take longer than the less than five minutes she had to spare before she ought to start for the hospital wing.

"Maybe your measurement was off?" Dean said hopefully, turning his own wand on the lumps as Professor Snape's office door snapped shut.

"I double checked. It should wear off in eight minutes, give-or-take…" Elizabeth trailed antagonistically, "He'll think I'm letting him down, I promised." She made most of the mess disappear from one of the tables with a single sweep of her wand.

"How 'bout I go up there, I can try and explain." Dean suggested.

"Could you?" Elizabeth asked hopefully, looking up after zapping another table's contents into an oblivion.

"He is my best mate." Dean replied wistfully. "I still can't believe he went that well for you." Shouldering his book bag he continued, "I'll go now."

Elizabeth nodded silently and continued scouring the floor. Professor Snape reentered and making "tutting" noises went to his desk. Elizabeth imagined that each of the piles was his head and felt slightly satisfied as each one disappeared.

While crouched over working on a particularly large lump Elizabeth heard swift footfall along the corridor.

"What are you doing in my classroom Longbottom?" Professor Snape asked in his low drawling voice. Elizabeth stood up from behind the desk to see Neville standing in the door way, face flushed from an obvious run.

" 'lizabeth--" he gasped, "Madam Pomfrey sent me... It's Seamus-"

"I don't believe it ness---" Was all Elizabeth heard Professor Snape say before she tore from the room, Neville in toe.

"Liz!" Neville called from somewhere behind her. "Liz, wait up!" But she did not slow until she reached to floor of the Hospital Wing.

Before she had even turned the corner Elizabeth heard the shouts. Pain, anger, frustration. Shouts poured from the closed ward of the hospital wing. Pushing her way through the small crowd of students that had accumulated outside the door Elizabeth had one guess at who was making the commotion.

"Finnigan's popped his top!" Shouted Draco Malfoy, gaining a howl of laughter from his fellow Slytherins.

Elizabeth ignored this and other rude comments as she slipped into the ward, closing the door behind her.

"What took you so long?" Dean demanded, coming over to Elizabeth from the edge of the partitions.

"What happened?" Elizabeth asked looking anxiously over at the partitions. Judging by the silhouettes, she guessed there were at least four other people on the other side, maybe five.

"Horrible." Dean answered shaking his head sadly. "He was still asleep when I came in, but after a minute he woke up. The first thing he said was your name. He looked about, no you, so he just started thrashing around, cursing and swearing at me, at everything." Dean finished, with a hurt look on his face. Elizabeth squeezed his arm reassuringly.

"Am I allowed to go over there?" Elizabeth asked, throwing another anxious look at the partitions.

"I don't see why n--" Dean was cut off by dull _clunk_, a crash followed by not enraged shouting, but dry weak tearful mumbling.

Four strides of her long legs carried Elizabeth around the corner of the partition. The view she saw made her feel quite ill.

The back partition had been knocked over, as was the potion cart, its contents lay spilt and shattered on the stone floor. Beside the bed, laying in the fetal position, Seamus had his arms thrown over his head. There was a slight blood splatter visible, he had a bleeding nose.

Professor Dumbledore along with Madam Pomfrey knelt beside Seamus though giving him his space. Professors Sprout, Sinistra and McGonagall al stood seemingly unsure of what to do. All the professors showed signs of a tussle but were now motionless watching as Seamus lay sobbing.

"… stop…leave me alone---knew it wasn't real…told you ---'t know anything. Please just leave me 'lone." Seamus's voice rose and fell with each sob. He was exhausted and after a moment grew too tired to speak and after a final plea, he quieted.

Elizabeth stood frozen to the spot, horrified by what she saw.

"Miss. Thornburn, where have you been?" Professor McGonagall was at her side. Her whispered demand brought Elizabeth out of her reverie.

"I had to stay to help _tidy up_ in my defense class." She explained watching as Seamus shied away from Professor Dumbledore's gentle hand and kind words. "What happened? Why--" Her voice trailed as she waved her hand at the scene before her eyes unable to believe that Seamus had taken such a great leap backwards after the breakthrough of the day before.

"We believe his captors may have used a polyjuice potion to look like a number of us while he was being-" Professor McGonagall looked uncomfortably sideways, "while he was being held captive."

"But how did they get your DNA?" Elizabeth whispered, shocked at this new bit of information.

"We are working on that, but I am afraid we may not want to know."

Elizabeth nodded in understanding. Moving around the bed, she knelt beside the headmaster and magical matron.

"Seamus?" Elizabeth whispered, "It's Elizabeth, sorry I'm late."

"Why do you do this?" Seamus's voice came muffled from behind his arms. "Why don't you just let me go, I don't know anything!"

"We love you Seamus," Elizabeth answered. One of the professors draped a thin bed sheet over Seamus's now shivering skin and bones body. "Seamus… I love you, do you remember?"

A pair of bright blue eyes peeped out from behind his arms a moment before he pulled the sheet over his head. "No you don't." He muttered, "You're not Elizabeth."

She knelt and sat back on her heels, crossing her arms over her chest. "What makes you say that?" She demanded.

"Elizabeth's never late. You think you were being cute, leading me on yesterday?" Seamus was furious. _He's still got his spirit. They didn't take that from him._ "You almost had me fooled," He continued, "But Elizabeth's never late."

"Stop flattering me, you're making it out that I'm perfect." Elizabeth laughed softly causing Seamus to cringe.

"Elizabeth _is_ perfect, you're not Elizabeth."

"This is getting nowhere." The girl muttered in exasperation under her breath. Looking up at the teachers, they all had thoughtful expressions mingled with their worry. Several encouraged her with nods.

"Suppose I'm not Elizabeth," She turned back to him, "Then who am I?"

"You know who you are." Seamus snarled, "Stop playing these sick games."

Elizabeth's feet began to tingle, they were falling asleep. _This might take a while_. She sat on the floor next to the still trembling figure.

"No one's _playing_ with you, Seamus. I'm not having any fun." Elizabeth waited a moment but got no reply. "Let's talk, I don't see any harm in that." Seamus shifted under the sheet but otherwise remained quiet. "How 'bout classes? I'm doing alright. We've almost finished studying Crups in the magical creatures class. They're really cute and playful. Really are like little Jack Russell Terriers. I'd like to get one as a pet but I think it'd attack my parents, they're muggles, you remember my parents don't you? Well they remember you; you came over a few times this summer…half of your get well cards are from my mum." She laughed slightly eying the bright elaborately decorated cards from her mother. She was an artist. Seamus was still, but by this she knew that he must be listening. "Professor Hagrid has been hinting at what out final project will be. If you don't have anymore of these ridiculous setbacks, you might be back in class for it. He hasn't said specifically what it is, but pretty much everyone figured out that its going to be Kelpies." Though still under the sheets, Elizabeth could tell by his change in position that he was now facing her. "Didn't your mum get you one for your sixteenth birthday? A strawberry roan mare--"

"Don't _you_ talk about me mam." Seamus's voice cut like steel through Elizabeth's sentence. "You don't know her."

"But Seamus I _do_ know her, _and_ your dad. I spent practically half the summer at your house! Remember your mum got mad at us for riding our brooms too high over the orchard, and when your dad ate a whole piece of that cake I burnt?" Elizabeth wiped back the tears that fell from her eyes as she remembered the fun and happiness of those all too short six weeks that seemed like a lifetimeago. Seamus' eyes appeared over top of the sheet. Though there was a guarded look about them, she could still see a faint smile dancing in their blue depths. _It's working_.

"Remember when you, me, Dean and your cousin Claire went camping? Claire fell into the creek and that Kappa was after her. You remember that don't you? We tried throwing pieces of cucumber from our salads at it but it didn't work? We laughed so hard that night. I wonder how it got there. Those things are Japanese aren't they?"

She paused a moment and heard Seamus mumble something.

"Sorry Seamus, I didn't quite catch that. What'd you say?

Seamus pushed himself, with some effort, into the sitting position. The sheet pooled at his waist.

"I said 'my neighbor brought one back from Asia during the spring.'" He spoke in an even tone, all anger gone from his voice. His nose had stopped bleeding though the blood was drying in a sticky red line down the side of his face.

"Ah, I knew I'd catch you. I really am sorry I was late. Snape kept me behind." Elizabeth explained, "So I guess som-" She faltered as Seamus threw himself at her.

She tensed. This would not be the first time he'd lashed out physically at anyone, but yet the first time he'd done so to her.

But instead of violence, she found only defeat. His arms hung loosely around her shoulders as his own shook with agonizing sobs. Women's intuition failing her and knowing nothing better to do, Elizabeth put her own arms around him and rocking him gently ran her fingers through his hair whispering reassuring words into his ear.

Hearing sighs behind her; Elizabeth looked up and saw Professor Dumbledore still standing in front of her. Holding Seamus's head to her shoulder like a child, Elizabeth smiled weakly up at the headmaster through tears of both relief and sorrow that streamed steadily down her face. Professor Dumbledore nodded to her with a slight smile on his face. He left nodding to the only remaining professors on his way out, Madam Pomfrey and Professor McGonagall.

Elizabeth sighed as Seamus shook with violent ripping sobs. This was going to be a long road…


	7. A Parcel and a Promise

Chapter Seven _A Parcel and a Promise_

_There's obviously been a change in him. I can't help but notice how much Seamus has been improving over such a short period of just three days. Now that he's come to terms with the fact that he's back with those who love him, he's been recovering so well. I guess it just took that little extra encouragement and he's regained his spirit. Well not completely. There's still a distance about his eyes. He tries to hide it but I know him better._

_I haven't been in my dorm that often lately. I go there only to get clean clothes. I haven't even slept in my bed since the night after that final breakthrough; Seamus was in my arms for at least an hour before Madam Pomfrey took control of the situation. But in that time there was such a connection, I don't think anything will ever break the bond we forged that evening._

_But still, there's that distance!_

_He smiled genuinely when Dean and Neville came to see him, just the day after. He even accepted the apology from Harry Potter when he came by, just as, if not more shattered by Seamus's ordeal than Seamus was. He seems to be taking the entire matter onto his own shoulders, like it's his own fault. Seamus wouldn't hear of it. _"It could have happened to anyone"_ he'd said. I hadn't ever blamed Harry, not really. But the fact that it happened to someone who had shared a dormitory with Harry for six years must have contributed to this. But if Seamus can forgive, I know I can and I have._

_That distance though. I came in yesterday, and when I dropped my bag at the foot of his bed, he feigned sleep! He made this sighing sound and rolled over. I've watched him sleep for a month now; who does he think he's fooling? After about ten minutes he turned back to me and 'woke up'. When I've been doing my homework, bring him up to speed in his classes, he sits there and look off. This glazed look takes over his face and he looks at the wall, but he's looking right through it. That's what bothers me most. I'm not patient, but I'm trying to be. He'll tell me when he's ready, that's when I'll be ready._

"Little steps Mr. Finnigan." Madam Pomfrey scolded, supporting him by holding just below his elbow.

Elizabeth snapped back to the task at hand. She and Madam Pomfrey were helping Seamus hobble around the hospital wing. He tried to mask the winces as each step brought a spasm of pain coursing through his lower extremities. He was determined to finish this workout. He staggered along with help, and even walked across the entire foot of his bed, grasping the bed frame for support, by himself.

"That's enough for one day." Madam Pomfrey said in a voice that was kind, but with enough force that Seamus didn't complain. The two lead him back to his bed, and he sat looking worn but proud of his accomplishment. "There's a package here for you by the way." The magical matron brought over a brown paper wrapped parcel and set it on his bedside table and left after giving him a warning to rest.

"Who's it from?" Elizabeth asked light heartedly as she lifted Seamus's feet into her lap. She took off his shoes and socks, and began kneading the burn cream into the bottom of his feet. Though the burns had now disappeared, the cream relieved the pain caused by his activity.

"I'm not sure." He turned his body to prop the pillow against the head of the bed. He leaned against the pillow and lifted the box into his lap. Opening the box with meticulousness as to not rip the paper; he pulled out a piece of regular lined paper. His eyes widened as he read the first line. "It's from me dad."

"Good news I hope." Elizabeth asked cautiously, knowing that his father was a muggle and his mother a witch. His father was taking the situation very harshly because he couldn't come and see his son.

He fell silent for a few minutes as he read and re-read the letter. "I suppose its good news," He finally answered, "Mam's having a baby.

"I know," Elizabeth said, but watched as Seamus's expression changed to surprise. "I saw her when you were in St. Mungo's"

"I see," Seamus fell silent for a moment, "Dad's just apologizing for not telling me earlier in the year. He said it might have been too large of a shock. And he said you're more than welcome to come over and stay for the summer but to 'no offence but leave her cooking at home'." He read parts of the letter, but his expression still remained confused.

"What's wrong?" Elizabeth asked, "You're alright about the baby, aren't you?"

Seamus thought a moment, and then looked up with a genuine smile, "Yah." Was all he said.

"What's in the package?" Elizabeth asked, her curiosity getting the better of her.

"Pictures from home, muggle pictures," He answered, pulling them out, eyeing the glossy prints. A rare amused smile spread across his face as he handed her the photos and reached into the box. "Me dad must have packed this." Elizabeth questioned as to what made him say that and as a response he pulled out several plastic cases. "Cds," He grinned, picking his way through them. Elizabeth recognized several of the artists. Seamus tossed them aside and reached again into the box. He pulled out a tattered and worn stuffed bear. A small innocent smile rose upon his lips. He spread his hand over the bear lovingly. "Eddy." He sighed.

"Eddy?" Elizabeth echoed. Finished rubbing the lotion into his feet, she closed the lotion tube and lobed it at the potion cart. She missed. The clatter caused Seamus to jump but he recovered quickly.

"Me dad got him for me while I was in hospital when mam had me. I've had him since." He smoothed his hand over the teddy again, and then tossed him at Elizabeth. "I wasn't very good with T's when mam asked me to give him a name. So it's Eddy."

Elizabeth smiled and looked down at the bear. He was obviously old, worn but loved. There was a big patch on its back and one of the eyes had noticeably been sewed on several more times than the other. Some stuffing stuck out of his ear, and his smile was half black, half dark red wool.

Madam Pomfrey came back to the partitions carrying a tray of broth for Seamus. "Miss Thornburn if I'd known you were still here I would have brought you a tray."

"That's alright," Elizabeth said, standing up and picking up the lotion tube to place it on the cart. "I was going to catch some supper after I'd finished up here."

"Well you make sure you get some supper." Madam Pomfrey looked sternly at Elizabeth as she put Seamus's supper in front of him. "Don't think I haven't noticed that you've been skipping meals."

"I'll eat," Elizabeth said, looking the matron straight in the eyes. Elizabeth was sure that the woman would see that she was lying. She had much homework to do and she was actually planning on sleeping in her dorm that night. "Promise," She added as Madam Pomfrey raised her eyebrows.

Making a tutting sound under her breath, Madam Pomfrey left the two alone, and closed the door to her office rather sharply.

"You've been skipping meals?" Seamus asked his tray sat forgotten.

"I've been worried." Elizabeth answered lamely. It was true, when Seamus had gone missing and when he had been returned she had been so worried that she ate no more than a meal every couple days. Of late, now that he was back and recovering, Elizabeth found herself skipping the same amount of meals, if not more.

"You're real thin." Seamus observed.

Elizabeth gave him a look that was perhaps more sharp than she'd intended.

"What I mean is you're thinner in a way that's unhealthy?"

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows.

"This isn't coming out right at all." Seamus frowned.

"Well you're thin too and I'm worried about you." Elizabeth snapped.

"Well don't worry about me then!" Seamus's voice rose uncharacteristically. He regained control of his volume. "I'm on the mend and I don't want you to get sick troubling yourself over me."

"How do you expect me not to worry?" Elizabeth asked. "All I've had to do is wait and wait until you've come around to me. There's been nothing but time and in that time I've been worried sick." A tear crept slowly down Elizabeth's cheek but she didn't even notice it. After a moment she brushed it away and turned from Seamus's hurt expression.

After a minute or two, Elizabeth became aware of a hand on her elbow. It registered in her brain along with the fact that Seamus had only ever willingly touched her and she turned back to face him.

"I'm sorry." Seamus whispered.

Elizabeth's anger melted and she immediately felt embarrassed. She ran her fingers through her hair and turned completely to face Seamus. "Don't be. I'm really sorry. I've been a twit."

"Thank you." Seamus said serenely. "Not like that. But you're helping me in ways that you'll never know." His hand stayed at her elbow, he formed circles over the bone with his thumb. "This is just helping me realize that there _are_ other people out there and that this ordeal has affected more people than just me."

Elizabeth wasn't sure what to say so she just nodded.

"But you still have to promise to eat something." Seamus urged. "Because as much as I enjoy your company, I don't want you to have to stay in the hospital wing with me,"

Elizabeth smiled.

"Promise?" Seamus persisted.

"I'll go down to the Great Hall right now." Elizabeth answered.

Seamus squeezed her elbow slightly in thanks.

As much as Elizabeth wanted to kiss him, she knew that it wasn't the time, so she just stood up and with a smile she left the room in the direction of the Great Hall.


	8. Never the Same

Chapter Eight _Never the Same_

Seamus continued pushing himself in his workouts during the remainder of the week. On Thursday Madam Pomfrey actually seemed pleased by his efforts and announced that the following day, should he be sound by morning, she would allow him to return to his dormitory that day and his classes on Monday. The only condition she set was that he had to go to the hospital wing at lunch times for the first month to continue taking his potions under her supervision after which time his dosages would be decreased and he would be able to take them in his dormitory.

Elizabeth could hardly express how overjoyed she was by this gigantic leap forward which she thought may never occur. In an attempt to show how pleased she was, she kept up with her promise and continued eating her meals in the Great Hall through the entire week. She found that she had a hard time consuming three meals a day, so ate only small portions for breakfast and supper, saving the majority of her eating for lunch when she visited Seamus in the hospital wing.

How much weight she had actually put off hadn't become evident to her until she was searching through the wooden chest at the foot of her bed that particular Friday morning as she was getting dressed to join the escort party to bring Seamus to his dorm.

"Lavender have you seen any of my robes?" She asked the other girl who sat before her bedside table, playing with her hair before the mirror.

"They're right here," Parvati said, pointing to the pile of black clothes on Elizabeth's bed where she sat.

"No, I think the laundry messed up, those are too wide for me." Elizabeth sighed, straightening up and snapping the lid of the trunk closed.

"They have your name inside." Parvati stated with raised eyebrows as she flipped out the name tag in the collar of one of the robes.

"You know you have lost a lot of weight since Seamus got back," Lavender said, looking over briefly before turning back to her reflection, and putting a final hair clip in its place. "Maybe you should go see Madam Pomfrey."

"As if I don't see enough off her already," Elizabeth shook her head, "Can I borrow one of your robes Lavender? These are all too big and Professor McGonagall will have my head if I show up to another one of her classes in these."

"You're too skinny even for my robes," Lavender said, sitting alongside Parvati, looking at the robes. "These are the same size as mine."

"Don't look at me," Parvati said, holding up her hands. "You're both taller than me and you'd look like Ron Weasley if you wore mine."

Elizabeth sighed and joined her friends on the bed. She looked mournfully at the oversized robes, she had never felt remotely insecure about her appearance, but now that she lost weight, she couldn't help but think that she must look like a bag of bones.

"Don't worry, you look fine." Lavender said, seemingly reading her mind which, Elizabeth mentally reminded herself she may well have been as Lavender spent so much time in their Divination class. "Besides, summer's coming up; you'll either gain it all back, or look wicked in a bikini."

Parvati laughed and Elizabeth smiled but her heart wasn't in it, though she knew the other girls couldn't tell.

--

When Friday finally arrived, it had already been decided that Seamus would return to Gryffindor tower during class time so he wouldn't draw too much attention to himself. Professor McGonagall made arrangements with Professor Flitwick and it was agreed that Elizabeth could miss her Charms class to join the escort party to Seamus's dormitory. Though Dean was denied permission to accompany the four (Madam Pomfrey included in the group) he arrived in the hospital wing with signs of a nose bleed down his front and a "Skiving Snack Box" in his bag. Seamus grinned broadly at his friend's appearance and thrust the box of cards and sweets he himself was going to carry to his dorm into his mate's hands.

The trip was uneventful at best and Elizabeth suspected that Professor McGonagall had employed the gaunt ghost the Bloody Barron to keep Peeves the Poltergeist away from them.

Though Seamus seemed fine as he made some hushed jokes with Dean, Elizabeth noticed with a painful twinge in her stomach that though he walked at a normal pace, Seamus had a slight limp in his step. Also she watched him wince as they passed a class full of second years who were chatting loud enough to put a hurricane to shame. She had an urge to reach out and take his hand in her own, but since the night he'd broken through and they'd forged their bond, she had refrained from touching him as he still tensed immensely whenever she accidentally touched him. Even when she was helping rub the lotion into his legs and arms, he fought to keep himself from involuntarily shaking.

When they reached the common room, Elizabeth saw Seamus brace himself as Professor McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey turned to him.

"Don't forget Mr. Finnigan, you are to--"

"Go to hospital wing every day at lunch for me potions," Seamus cut off Professor McGonagall, taking the pile of bedclothes Madam Pomfrey had put on the couch.

"You are to come and see me if there are any difficulties." The Professor continued.

"Aye," Seamus said glumly, Elizabeth saw his eyes flicker towards Dean momentarily.

"Both in and out of class," Professor McGonagall persisted.

"Aye," He said quickly.

"And if you're feeling too overwhelmed--"

"I understand!" Seamus snapped uncharacteristically but quickly added "professor," In a measured tone.

Professor McGonagall's mouth drew into a straight line, but even as Elizabeth watched, the professor's eyes filled with unmistakable pity. Whether he noticed this expression as well, or by coincidence, Seamus nodded curtly to the professor and the matron, and turned on his heel, soon after disappearing up the staircase to the boy's dormitory.

Dean followed but Elizabeth remained rooted to the spot, shocked by Seamus's behavior. He had always been calm and stable, he hardly ever snapped at anyone, especially someone trying to help him. She was almost used to his random outbursts of frustration which were growing less frequent by the day, but he never lashed out at a teacher anymore.

"Be patient Miss Thornburn," Madam Pomfrey reassured, handing her a tube of lotion which Seamus had neglected to collect from her before heading up the stairs. "He'll come around."

Elizabeth nodded slowly with a false smile, and turned to follow the other two.

"Miss. Thornburn, you and Mr. Thomas are to return to your classes this afternoon." Elizabeth heard Professor McGonagall's voice follow her up the stairs.

Like that'll happen. Elizabeth thought to herself.

Reaching the sixth year's dorm room, Elizabeth pushed open the already ajar door. Seamus was rummaging through his trunk while Dean was putting some books in his bag. After a moment, Dean took Elizabeth's place at the door as she sat on Seamus's bed.

"I'm going to get to class, Snape'll murder if I don't show." Dean explained before turning to descend the stairs but before he took the first stair he turned back momentarily, "Try to keep it PG ok kids?"

Seamus looked up but Dean had already hurried out of sight. Elizabeth set the cream on the bedside table and reached for the box of cards on the floor by the bed.

"Don't," Seamus said suddenly.

Elizabeth looked up as Seamus came over and nudged the box under the bed with his foot. She shrugged.

"So what're you planning on doing?" She asked as Seamus bent to untie and then remove his shoes.

"I would actually like to sleep for a wink," Seamus explained. When he looked up and saw the look Elizabeth gave him he continued. "Seriously, I couldn't sleep last night."

"Me neither," Elizabeth nodded. She stood and pulled back the covers while Seamus took off the robe he'd worn and dropped it on the floor. As he crawled under the blankets, Elizabeth picked up the robe and draped it over the back of the chair beside Seamus's bed before sitting on the bed beside his pillow. "But you can't get rid of me that easily. I've been waiting too long to have you back, I'm staying right here." Dropping her own shoes, she put her feet on the bed and leaned her back against the headboard.

Seamus looked up at her for a moment with an expression she was unable to read and after turning on his side to face her, she heard him whisper in a voice barely audible, "Thanks." It didn't take long before his breathing deepened. He was asleep.


	9. In the Dark

Chapter Nine _In the Dark_

_The darkness. _

_There is nothing but darkness._

_There is only ever darkness._

_I can't remember the last time I saw actual sunlight._

_This room, this cell has been my home for an infinite number of days. The air is damp, it smells, the smell is something I can't escape._

_I'm so hungry. They only ever give me water. Water and that green potion once every day, or what I can only assume to be days. There must be something in the potion that keeps me alive; I can't see any other purpose for it. The water's not bad either, not like you read about; people being kept prisoner, given only muddy and stale water. I think the water comes from a tap or a well, I don't think they would go through the trouble of messing with my water._

_I really wish they would unchain me though. Whenever they come in to give me the liquids, they either unchain me or chain me up. I've been chained for so long now and I'd really like to sleep. My wrists are attached to something that reaches up to the ceiling my ankles to the floor. I've been standing like this for over a day I think._

_Maybe they forgot about me._

_Maybe they're leaving me here to die._

_I don't want to die._

Watching him sleep, his eyelashes lay softly on his cheeks, his lips parted just so. His chest rises and falls gently with each breath.

I think this may be the first time he's slept without the aid of the sleeping draught.

I wonder what's going on inside his head; I know the purple potion stopped his dreams.

I wonder if he'll dream.

_I can hear footsteps outside my cell, someone must be coming. Perhaps they'll grant my wish and unchain me. The heavy solid wooden door opens and I'm blinded by the light, and my hopes rise as one of the two dark silhouettes --death eaters I realize-- comes over and begins fiddling with the chains around my wrists as the other frees my feet._

"_Wouldn't look so hopeful if he knew what's coming," A dull male voice spoke._

"_She's going to have fun with this one." A second equally dull voice spoke, wrapping a blindfold around my eyes. "I almost feel sorry for the thing, fuckin' mudblood."_

_One of them punched me hard in the stomach and I realize, as I keel over, that my wrists are no longer attached to the ceiling, but rather chains that are being held by one of the death eaters._

_They drag me down a hall, walking too fast for me to stay with their pace as they pull on the chains around my wrists. I try to keep up, but am barely able owing to the blindfold and the shackles that still bind my feet._

_I can hear screams in the distance._

_There is sobbing all around me._

_In a way I don't want the blindfold to come off. _

_We stop finally, but before I have the chance to even move, my arms are raised and chained again, this time at an almost unbearable height. My feet are again chained to the floor, about my shoulder width apart. I don't know how long they're going to keep me like this but I seriously hope it's not for long; my shoulders are already starting to hurt._

"_Have fun." I hear one of the men grumble somewhere behind me. Then I hear the two sets of heavy footsteps disappear in the opposite direction as we had come._

_This room smells different. Coppery. It's much colder than my cell and I can hear a gurgling ---like bubbling mud--- off to my right._

_After about a minute I come to realize that there is another sound, metal on metal. There must be someone else in the room._

"_Who's there?" I demand; my voice bounces off the walls. _

_There is no answer, only a sizzling followed shortly by a gulping sound and then footsteps. Soft padding footsteps come right in front of me. Soft fingers brush against my cheek and in a moment my blindfold is removed. I am greeted by a black cloak covering a figure that is about a head shorter than me. My eyes dart to the right, a small cauldron hovers over another larger one, the larger one holding a fire, the smaller one bubbling and emitting a soft steam._

"_You've been here for so long, why don't you just tell them about the Order's plans?" A familiar feminine voice comes from the depths of the dark hood._

"_I don't know anything about any bloody 'Order'," I answer. I'd been asked the same question when I'd first arrived. Something about Professor Dumbledore and some "Order of the Phoenix". I've never heard of this Order, unless they had terribly mixed up this with the DA._

"_Please," The woman's voice whines, "For me?" She lowers her hood, and by the soft light provided by the cauldron's small flames, I gasp in shock at what I see._

"_Elizabeth, what're you doing here?"_

"_Tell me the Order's plans." Elizabeth whines, ignoring my question. She takes a step towards me, bringing her face mere inches from my own. "Pretty Please." Her voice holds a certain sugary tone which is completely uncharacteristic of the Elizabeth I know. She usually ridicules girls who talk like that._

"_You're not Elizabeth." I state._

"_Don't hurt my feelings Seamus," She feigns offence. Something in the line her lips make reminds me of Elizabeth, everything about her reminds me of Elizabeth._

"_How'd you get here?" I ask._

"_I'll answer that when you answer my question." She says shaking her head softly._

"_I don't know anything about this 'Order'," I answer. "Besides, everything I know, you know." _

"_Well remind me." Elizabeth whispers, seductively drawing her long nails over my lips. They turn from soft tickling to razor sharp in an instant and the nail of her index finger bites into my lower lip, it stings._

"_Who are you?" I demand. I can feel the drop of blood streak down my chin_

"_It's me, Elizabeth." She answers, and she starts to roll up the sleeves of her robes. Her hand freezes when she reaches the elbow of the one sleeve. My eyes sweep momentarily over what appears to be an ink sketch on her arm before she quickly steps behind me. "----Lucius" I hear her mumble. When she returns, both her sleeves are down and she holds something in her hand._

"_You're not."_

"_Don't hurt my feelings," She whines. Her fingers reach for my robes and she begins unbuttoning them. I look down to see the long object in her hand, but she uses her free hand to gently nudge my chin up so I was looking her straight in the eyes._

_The cold air hits my chest like a bag of bricks and I realize that she had unbuttoned not only my robes, but the button down shirt I have on as well. I try to move away, causing the chains both on my feet and my wrists, to rattle loudly, the sound bounces off the low ceiling and walls. _

"_Who the hell are you?" I demand my voice harsh and cold to match the room._

"_I'm Elizabeth." She persists, and taking another step towards me, she stands on her toes, and pressing her body against mine, she tries to kiss me._

_This is much more than I can bear; my body hardens as I tense and I clamp my mouth closed tight, turning my head purposefully away from her so she can't reach my lips._

"_Fine," Her voice turns cold and she walks to my side, busying herself with my sleeve. I suddenly realize that there is another figure in the room, leaning against the wall near the cauldrons._

"_Why don't you just tell her the Order's plans mate?" Dean asks walking over._

"_Dean, that's not Elizabeth," I pull against the chains, but immediately am met with more than just the pain of the iron on my wrists, but a sharp, piercing pain in my side._

"_Oopsie!" Elizabeth's voice comes falsely high. She continues with what she'd been doing, cutting away at my robes so they fall in shreds on the floor at my feet._

_Dean continually presses me for information about this 'Order' I'm beginning to think this isn't Dean._

_My attention is drawn to Elizabeth as she cuts off my clothes, piece by piece, article by article. I am embarrassed, and want to stop her before I am completely naked, but I am immobilized, afraid that the knife she holds will slip again._

"_Isn't that just the worst part?" She asks as though reading my thoughts. "The waiting, the anticipation--" She pokes my chest with the knife's tip, it doesn't break the skin but as she drags the metal over my chest beads of blood rise on the line. "You never know where or when I'll…cut." The blade had sliced along and eventually cut deep into the flesh on the opposite side of where the first cut had been. I don't cry out, but my gasp could be interpreted as such._

_The cell is cold and as she lowers the knife to remove my last article of clothes, my body quivers slightly._

"_Wouldn't want to move, would we?" she asks sweetly, dean chuckles._

_There is only one way to overpower a man that is worse than breaking his will of silence. There is only one way to truly have completely broken a man, to have total power over him._

His sleep has to be full of bad memories. At least when he's awake, he can focus on other things besides memories.

She watches as his facial features begin to contort while he mumbles randomly.

To reach out and smooth his sandy hair would only mean waking him. Perhaps it would be kinder to wake him. But I know he hasn't slept well at all this week, he needs his sleep.

She watches as Seamus trembles under the heavy red covers, his eyes squeezed tightly closed, his knees drawn to his chest as he lay in the fetal position.

I wonder if he'll ever tell me exactly what happened…I wonder when he'll be ready…I wonder when I'll be ready.

_He felt the cold of the coppery, dingy cell tearing into him. The small fire in the little cauldron did nothing to ward off the cold._

_He wished he could cross his legs, cover himself, curl up on the floor, anything. He had been violated by the vile creature which looked so much like his girlfriend._

_His pure, beautiful, loving girlfriend…how he missed her._

_He stood, still chained feeling dirty, so dirty, he wanted nothing more than to escape his body. His shoulders burned, his abs stung as they were cris-crossed with numerous shallow cuts._

_Without warning the chains holding his wrists raised towards the ceiling, taking away the slight slack that had been there. With pain that he scarcely could have imagined, his feet left the ground so he was suspended only by his wrists._

_Crying out in agony as his assent was halted; his toes only just skimming the floor, his shout was answered by leather straps which extended from the chains around his wrists and wrapped around his arms and all the way to his biceps, putting the strain on his shoulders rather than his wrists._

"_Did you know," Elizabeth spoke. "Some people say that burning human flesh smells," She paused a moment pulling a red hot metal poker from the fire, admiring the glowing tip with fascination. "…just like cooking pig?"_

_His eyes widened as she approached. "You wouldn't…" His voice trailed. He no longer felt anything, but became acutely aware of the heat pulsing off the rod as it neared the bottom of one of his feet. He felt as though his head was under water, there was suddenly no other noise, not the distant sobbing, not the yelling in the corridors, not even the bubbling of the cauldron. He heard only the angry boiling hiss below himself, the shout of pain which echoed off the walls, a shout that must have come from his own mouth, and the splatter of projectile vomit which hit the floor at his feet._

_Cruel, high pitched female laughter filled the air as everything turned black._


	10. The Yule Ball

Chapter Ten _The Yule Ball_

Elizabeth sat with her arms folded across her chest and her right leg crossed over her left; raised right foot bobbing in time with the music. Her date; a tall, lean seventh year from Durmstrang slouched idly next to her drinking heavily from his bottle of Butterbeer (she suspected that he had added something more to the drink, considering the glazed look that overtook his eyes after only a quarter of the bottle. That, or he was a complete light-weight).

"I'm going for something to drink," she declared, standing and turning brusquely away from her date. Had she been paying any attention to her escort, she would have seen his clouded, beady eyes break focus from the group of promiscuous fifth year Hufflepuff females making a spectacle of themselves, only a moment before he returned to his entertainment. But she didn't see, instead she walked straight across the dance floor and to the temporary bar in the corner of the Great Hall, with eyes only for a tall glass of something. Anything.

"Some punch please," she asked after flagging down one of the house-elf bartenders. The short male wearing a stereotypical barkeep's attire of dark sacks, long white shirtsleeves and bands around the upper-arm; set a clean glass in front of her and walked away. As he turned, the glass filled with the deep red drink before her eyes and had she been in higher spirits, she might have been amused.

She stood with her elbows taking the brunt of her weight, leaning heavily on the solid wood of the bar: she looked dully into the clear red liquid separated from her hand by a Tom Collins. She closed her eyes; brought the glass to her lips and its effects were immediate. Her shoulders relaxed as she took her first long draft, the liquid trickling down her parched throat. Fruity, cold but followed by the unmistakable warmth of something else: the something else she'd been seeking.

Fred and George's handiwork, without a doubt

"Hello Elizabeth," a warm male's voice said in a low tone over her left shoulder. She turned to offer a greeting, but in finding no one, returned to her drink which she immediately slammed down on the counter harder than she'd intended to. Standing immediately at her right was her fellow fourth year, Seamus Finnigan.

"Seamus," she hissed. "You scared me."

"Sorry," he mumbled, a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. Obviously not too sorry.

In an attempt to regain some composure (and shock relief), Elizabeth brought the glass to her lips again. She instantly felt a drop of the beverage slide from the corner of her mouth to her chin.

"First time, new mouth?" Seamus asked nonchalantly, quickly snagging the drop with a napkin before it fell to her dress robe.

"Thanks," it was now Elizabeth's turn to mumble, she took the napkin to wipe her mouth and hide the smile that had spread across it.

Seamus hailed a pair of Butterbeers and Elizabeth gratefully abandoned her feigned prim demeanor accepted the familiar bottle.

"So where's your date?" She asked as the pair stood with their backs to and elbows on the bar, facing the dance floor and the swaying couples, or in some cases, trios.

Seamus didn't speak, but rather took a long swig of his own beverage and, while swallowing, gestured with the bottle to a particular place on the floor.

Elizabeth followed his gaze to see Parvati Patil (who should have been seen with Harry Potter) hanging off the arm of a seventh year Durmstrang, and introducing Lavender Brown (who should have been seen with Seamus) to another tall Durmstrang student.

"You're better off without her," Elizabeth said. She was surprised she'd just said this of her own best friend, but knew it was the truth and smiled over at Seamus.

"Where's your date?" Seamus demanded, putting emphasis on the possessive part.

"Pfft." Elizabeth realized a moment too late that she sounded like a horse and looked like a drunk as she waved her bottle toward the dance floor in general with no particular direction. But upon seeing Seamus smile she blushed and thanked the gods for the invention of foundation and rouge, covering her involuntary flush.

"You're better off without him," Seamus said, taking a mouthful of Butterbeer.

Elizabeth began to feel her mood lighten considerably with the aid of Seamus at her side and the drink in her hand. Watching the dancing on the floor, she began to discreetly tap her toes.

"Well, I'm going to dance," Seamus announced, setting his now empty bottle carefully on the bar and walking out the floor.

Elizabeth watched him walk a few meters away from her, her heart sinking with every step, until it jumped to her throat as he turned.

"Aren't you coming?"

"You want to dance with me?" She managed with her vital organ invading her vocal cords.

Seamus smiled a lopsided grin. "Well I'd look a sight dancing by me self," and at that he put his arms around an invisible girl and twirled her around a few times to prove his point.

Elizabeth turned; placed her bottle on the bar, calmed herself with a quick, deep breath, as she realized she was grinning like a complete idiot, and joined Seamus who offered her his hand in a mock-genteel manner.

He lead her to a semi-empty space on the dance floor, squeezed between three dancing cliques, but immediately they were given more space as the Weird Sister changed fluidly from an upbeat song to a slower one. Everyone paired up or left the floor.

Seamus immediately took one of her hand in his own, and placed his other on the small of her back, pulling her inconspicuously closer to himself. Her free hand rested on his shoulder. They moved with the music, but not with each other. He looked awkwardly away from her, scanning their fellow dancers and, after realizing that his eyes were elsewhere, she too looked anywhere but at him.

Elizabeth was almost relieved when the tempo quickened again to a fast paced song. She began to draw away from Seamus, but found resistance. Looking into his eyes she found now that he was looking intently at her, both his arms now encircling her waist. They danced together, his arms around her midriff, hers around his neck. But she realized quickly that his movements were too fast given the rhythm of the song. She closed the gap between their hips and took control over his speed, movement and (little to her knowledge) his thoughts.

Their bodies now began to move as one. One with each other, one with the music, together they now moved with an undeniable ease. The music's quickening pace demanded an equivalent speed from their grinding dance. Although their movements were slower than the song's cadence, they remained in sync with the pulsing tenor of the bass.

The masses of the other dancers around them pushed them together, they moved with as much freedom as they were allowed. Although Elizabeth felt herself come into contact with several people, not one took any more notice of her than she did of them.

Both Seamus's hands rested easily on her lower back now; occasionally he would press his fingertips into the small of her back sending ripples of shivers through her. As he did this for a third time, Elizabeth closed her eyes a moment and inhaled a deep, drawn breath. When she opened her eyes, she was met with Seamus's vibrant blue eyes looking directly into hers. The song was drawing to a close but both were reluctant to abandon their new position, both reluctant to end this discovery and exploration of uncharted territory in their relationship. As the final notes came to a close and a different more technical song started, their movements slowed to a stop.

Elizabeth still clung to him and he made no motion to put any space between them. Seamus took a deep breath, inadvertently exhaling softly, his breath dancing across her face. She relished the slight caress on her hot face and realized how uncomfortable the heat of the surrounding bodies was making her.

"D'you want to go for a walk?" Seamus asked loudly over the new song. He didn't yell, for his voice had taken on a deep, almost husky tone that carried to her ears easily.

Elizabeth answered simply with a nod and allowed him to guide her from the dance floor, his hand low on the small of her back. As they walked between the few tables, Elizabeth made a mental note of all the familiar face that gave the pair a thorough looking over. She would have to avoid them until after the Christmas break at least.

Seamus grabbed two fresh bottles of Butterbeer from the bar and again guided her smoothly through the cliques of students and the odd teacher until they'd left the Great and Entrance Halls, abandoning the warmth of the castle for the cold rosebush lined cobblestone walkways which wound around the grounds.

Elizabeth wished for her cloak.

Even though they were coined "dress-robes", the females' were in all aspects, ball gowns, the males', suits or tuxes (with some exceptions). Unbeknownst to the exact purpose of the dress-robes, Elizabeth had chosen one that had no sleeve nor straps and practically nothing over her back save the silky laces tethered from her lower back to her shoulder blades. As they moved along the grounds, sipping their Butterbeers, she inconspicuously moved closer to Seamus, foolishly hoping for some heat to radiate from him to her.

Seamus was chatting comfortably about Lavender ditching him for the Durmstrangs, and smoothly transitioned from that dreary topic to Quidditch, and commenting on how he should like to play Keeper.

He paused in his ramble to take a swig of his drink. Elizabeth watched with amazement, as if seeing him for the very first time. He lifted the bottle to his mouth, parting his lips just so and tipped the bottle so just the right amount of the liquid poured into his mouth. After a brief pause in his cheeks, his throat subtly contracted, Adam's apple bobbing slightly, he swallowed.

Although it took all of a few seconds, time slowed in Elizabeth's eyes and his movements, as simple as they were suddenly became so graceful, complex and delicate.

She snapped back to reality when she realized how slow he was at bringing the bottle from his mouth, holding it an inch from his mouth. She was staring.

"What?" Seamus asked, tilting his head slightly, lowering the bottle.

"Nothing," Elizabeth said too quickly. She was thankful for a second time that night for the invention of cover-up and rouge. She took a quick drink and tried to clear her head with a surreptitious shake of her head. She couldn't believe she was that fascinated by Seamus swallowing some Butterbeer.

Seamus didn't comment any further and they continued to walk in a comfortable silence, though Elizabeth now became aware of a small smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.

As the cold began to make her almost bare feet feel numb, Elizabeth suggested they return to the Hall. Moving aside for a very disgruntled Madam Maxime as she stormed in the opposite direction, the pair returned to the inviting light of the castle. They approached the castle and loud music filled their ears.

When they were half way up the stairs (which were littered with couples and groups of chatting friends) to the large open wooden doors, Elizabeth felt; with a small tingle up her spine that which had nothing to do with the late December cold, Seamus's hand return to the small of her back. He walked closer to her than before and when they emerged into the crowded and noisy Entrance Hall, she felt his shoulder against her's.

After some fancy maneuvering on Seamus's part, they secured a place on the dance floor once again and joined the dancing couples in the newly struck slow song.

Seamus guided their motions now, controlling their speed and direction, holding her to himself with gentle yet firm pressure.

Elizabeth, now warm and getting sleepier by the second, closed her eyes and rested her head against Seamus's chest a moment. She soon felt his hand travel up her back along her arm and up eventually to her chin. He lifted her face and much to her surprise she felt his lips meet her own. Even more to her surprise she drew on his lips with her own, kissing him back.

She pulled back from the kiss with a small gasp for proper air, the feel of his tongue on hers still very strong. They were now both standing at the foot of the stairs to the girl's dormitory in the vacant common room. She opened her eyes at the same second he did and they both realized that it felt right.

She closed her eyes again and felt the mattress under her, the solid headboard at her back and the sunlight on the other side of her closed eyelids.

Her eyes snapped open when she heard the shout.


	11. Performing a Miracle

Chapter 11 _Performing a Miracle_

"Bloody hell!!"

Elizabeth woke with a start at Seamus's exclamation. She jumped up; her feet finding the floor before she was even awake and conscious of her movement. Seamus shot out of the bed on the other side, his eyes ablaze with fear and pain.

As Elizabeth scrambled around the bed, Seamus coughed twice, deep and ripping coughs before landing on his knees, hands flat on the floor, and vomiting.

Elizabeth reached him and, through reflex, put a hand at his back and another on his chest, just under his collarbone. She rubbed small circles at that point. She squeezed her eyes shut when another splash hit the floor. His body trembled in her arms.

"It's ok; its all going to be ok," she reassured, her voice soothing. "You're going to be fine."

"How can you be so sure?" He croaked, wiping his mouth on his sleeve and looking up at her. He turned back to the floor and sat back on his feet, his eyes now squeezed shut. His elbows were resting on his knees, as he hunched over. Elizabeth became suddenly acutely aware that he was clutching her hand, holding it to his chest, stationary. "How do you know that everything's going to be ok? That I'm going to be fine?"

Elizabeth did not answer right away which prompted Seamus to look back up at her; his eyes searched hers quickly, jumping from eye to eye.

"Because I've got you," she answered lamely.

He held her gaze for a moment longer before again, closing his eyes. He leaned towards her, resting his forehead against her chest. She wrapped her arms around him. Tears started to stream down her cheeks as she took in the feeling and warmth of his body against hers. Willingly and desperately, he pressed his trembling body against her own and she answered by holding him as close and as tightly as she dared.

She felt a relief that she had never thought of because she had never expected it. She felt like coming home after a long absence. A painfully drawn out and long absence.

Elizabeth, after a small amount of time, shifted her position and slowly stood.

"Don't leave me," Seamus whispered, his eyes grew wide as he looked up at her.

Elizabeth said nothing but helped Seamus to his feet and back onto the bed. She drew the covers over him, and mindful not to undo the progress that had just been made, she lay next to him on top of the covers. She lay on her side, facing him and waited for him to lean into her before she wrapped her arms around him again.

She watched as Seamus's eyes started drooping and finally remained closed. His breathing had deepened, each breath playing gently across her face, bathing her in his scent.

She became aware that the sun was slanting in the sky and that quite soon the boys who called this dormitory home would arrive.

Pulling her wand out slowly and pointing it at the curtains she whispered the incantation softly, almost not at all, and drew the deep red curtains around them, plunging them into darkness.

After a moment's hesitation and deliberation, Elizabeth gently caressed Seamus's soft, short hair.

Elizabeth woke to find herself in complete darkness. Something was pressing uncomfortably into her side, she began to feel around for her wand. After a frustrating and slightly painful moment, she finally muttered "Lumos," under her breath. A thin sliver of light peeped out from under her.

"Argh," She groaned quietly reaching between herself and the mattress and pulling out her wand. "Nox."

She rolled onto her back in the renewed darkness. Someone was snoring softly in the room to her left, deep breathing filled the air and somewhere across the room was nonsensical sleep mumbling.

Laying on her side, Elizabeth reached out slowly in front of her and felt her fingertips brush against Seamus. Rather than the material of the shirt he'd gone to sleep in, she felt skin. Confused, she relit her wand.

When the light beam found Seamus's back, Elizabeth closed her eyes for a moment.

She had been greeted with the red face of the serpent etched into the skin of Seamus's back. She'd seen this image more often than she liked. There were angry red markings covering his back from his shoulders to where his waist disappeared beneath the thick scarlet blanket on his bed.

Elizabeth rose up onto her elbow and with disturbed fascination brought her wand up and, cupping the tip in her hand to dim the light, she looked over his back. Starting at what was once a deep gouge in his side just above his hip, but what was now the palest of pink scars; an elaborate and unsettling illustration of a serpent with an open mouth displaying long sharp pointed fangs was etched into the skin of his back. The depiction ran across his broad back with intricate detail and as if the drawing wasn't enough, several times on his lower back as well as his shoulder blades, there were games of tic-tac-toe actually drawn into his flesh.

Though some of the shallower incisions were healing to a faint pink, they would all be lasting. He would forever have the grotesque brand, a constant reminder for him, a constant reminder for Elizabeth of what had happened.

Very slowly, Elizabeth sat up and lifted the blanket over him, covering him, hiding his back from her.

"Is it really that bad?" He asked; his voice breaking the silence smoothly, it was not cracked with sleep but rather a measured whisper.

Elizabeth did not jump at his voice. She lay back down, her head beside his on his pillow, he was facing her and she, on her side, was facing him. She held her wand tip in her hand so its glow was dim, throwing her face into shadow and so she could just barely make out his features.

"I'm sorry," She whispered.

"Don't be,' He whispered back with the smallest shake of his head.

"Was it… I mean, when… when they… did…" Elizabeth's voice trailed off.

Seamus was silent for a minute, looking into her eyes. His expression was completely still and she was silent, barely daring to breathe.

"It was near the end… when," he was speaking very softly, only just above a whisper. His tone was even, measured but he paused to swallow. "When she did this."

"Who…?" Elizabeth started but stopped when Seamus's expression turned to one of pain. Elizabeth bit her lower lip.

It took another full minute of silence before he continued.

"There was a mirror in the room…" His voice trailed off and he closed his eyes. "If I closed my eyes she… there was a metal rod that she kept in a fire and if I closed my eyes…" his voice trailed again and Elizabeth's eyes widened. "She said she wanted me to see her work," he stopped again; his eyes were still closed.

"They were both so… relentless, they kept asking me over and over and over again about the Order, but I've never known anything about that. I've never even heard of it." He was speaking in short choppy sentences. Elizabeth watched as his expression remained blank and his eyes closed as he muttered this to her. "I mean, its not like I would have told them anything even if I had known, but they kept drilling me and I had no idea what was going on or why I was there or why you were--"

He stopped abruptly, his eyes snapping open.

"Why I was what, Seamus?" she breathed.

"Nothing," he said too quickly. His face was blank, but his eyes were desperately searching hers'.

"Why I was…" Elizabeth's voice trailed off.

"We believe his captors may have used a polyjuice potion to look like a number of us while he was being-" Professor McGonagall looked uncomfortably sideways, "while he was being held captive."

"But how did they get your DNA?" Elizabeth whispered, shocked at this new bit of information.

"They weren't impersonating the professors…" Elizabeth gasped as she grasped what the professor had said and what she herself had refused to consider. Immediately tears were streaming down her face.

"No, its ok. I know it wasn't you." Seamus whispered his eyebrows raised and knitted together in worry. He slid closer to her on the bed.

Elizabeth however was devastated at this piece of information. She closed her eyes and covered them with her hands. She could see it so vividly as if it was being projected onto her mind's eye, or worse, like she had actually been there. She could see herself holding the red hot rod that inflected the burns on the bottoms of his feet, on the backs of his legs. She could see herself holding a small penknife and etching into his back the large elaborate snake. She could hear his agonized yell…

"Elizabeth, stop it." Seamus's voice commanded firmly.

Elizabeth felt her hands being removed from her eyes against her will.

Blinking back the tears that were obscuring her vision, Elizabeth saw that Seamus was holding her hands in his own on the bed, he was much closer to her than when she'd retreated behind them. His eyes were searching hers and she could see that his were brimmed and watery like hers. But his tears would not spill over.

"This is all wrong," Elizabeth whispered fiercely, attempting to take her hand back so as to wipe the tears from her cheeks. Seamus didn't let go of her hands. "I should be comforting you."

"That's really ok," Seamus said, warily lifting a strand of Elizabeth's hair that was plastered to her cheek with a tear, and tucking it behind her ear. "A change is good."

Elizabeth watched his seemingly casual actions as though he was performing a miracle. He wiped a tear from her cheek with the back of his index finger and then took her hands in his again.

"Please don't cry anymore," Seamus said. Elizabeth looked back into his eyes and found them beseeching her to comply. But she found herself doing the exact opposite; tears ran down her cheeks, wetting the pillow.

And yet in the confusion and overwhelming guilt at this new information, she felt warmth, she felt protection, she felt relief and she felt joy. She felt Seamus wrap his arms around her and draw her close to him.

Where as her tears had been silent before, she now sobbed openly into his chest, though only for a moment before she remembered that they were in his dorm and were surrounded by sleeping classmates. She quieted her sobs and in doing so, took control over her tears. She looked up at Seamus who was looking down at her with a patient look. A small smile set on his lips.

I look up at his sleeping face, a slight frown on his lips. I wonder if I will ever see him smile at me in that easy way again. I wonder if I will ever see him smile again.

A single tear escaped her eye and after wiping that one away for her; Seamus, with gentle pressure, drew her head to his chest and rested his chin on the top of her head, muttering low and soothing reassurances.


	12. A Warning

Chapter Twelve _A Warning_

Seamus returned to his classes on the first Monday of May.

Elizabeth knew he would be fine in his first class, Muggle Studies, because he was in the same class as Dean and Neville.

Why those boys had chosen to take that class was a mystery to Elizabeth, for she knew that all three of them had strong muggle or muggle related backgrounds. After she left Seamus with the other two, Elizabeth departed in the opposite direction. She had divination.

"My dear, I'm so relieved you joined us today!" Professor Trelawney's mystical voice greeted her before she had even fully ascended the silver staircase to the tower classroom.

Elizabeth knew she wasn't late, as a matter-of-fact she was early, as usual. Not quite as early as Parvati and Lavender who made the dim tower their second home, but early nonetheless.

"I was afraid you wouldn't make it to our class today but rather stay and help your significant other adjust to his return to his classes," The professor spoke softly and she carried a teacup and saucer over to where Elizabeth settled herself with Lavender and Parvati, both of whom were already drinking their tea.

"True, I admit I had considered staying away from your class today," Elizabeth admitted after receiving her tea and taking a courteous first sip. "But I decided to come for I had a very strong feeling that we would be doing something very important today." Elizabeth spoke with a moderately mystical voice that she aloud herself only ever to use when she was in that particular school tower.

The three girls were friends of sorts with Professor Trelawney. And (though for obvious reasons she hadn't of late), Elizabeth occasionally accompanied her two friends when they would spend their leisure time pouring over star charts and crystal balls. She wouldn't admit it to neither her friends nor the professor, but she had lost a considerable amount of faith in the class after there had been absolutely no warning of danger whatsoever prior to Seamus's capture.

"My dear, I'm overjoyed at how well your inner eye is opening," Professor Trelawney said, her eyes growing in both amazement and excitement. "We are indeed venturing deeper into our tarot cards today and will be interpreting our year long forecasts by looking at the Ancient Rune cards."

The four sat discussing the lesson for some time. Elizabeth, Parvati and Lavender drank their tea and when finished examined their tealeaves. After each girl made an attempt at her own (using their memory, not their books for reference), they each, in turn, handed their cup to the Professor.

Elizabeth was shocked by Professor Trelawney's expression as she reached for Elizabeth's cup. But she was more shocked when the expression (which had been expectant and hopeful) dropped almost immediately to one of sadness and grief.

"What is it Professor?" Parvati asked, looking at Elizabeth with wide eyes before turning her attention back to the Professor.

"I see a most unpleasant year ahead for you, I'm so sorry dear," Professor Trelawney placed the cup back on the table and slid it away, looking distastefully at it.

Elizabeth was immediately distressed in that Professor Trelawney was more sincere than she'd ever seen. Although the woman had relished in foreseeing others misfortunes, she never did such for these girls unless it was necessary and almost always happened to be true.

"How could anything be worse than what happened this year?" Lavender questioned incredulously.

"Please don't mind me saying, but this year was worse for Mr. Finnigan than it was for Miss. Thornburn," She turned back to Elizabeth. "I'm afraid I can't tell exactly what this means, but you would be wise to take care to mind who you associate yourself with over the summer and next year."

From the expression the professor had as she said this, Elizabeth didn't for a single second consider not adhering to this advice.

"I'm sorry," Professor Trelawney said, looking surprisingly ashamed. "I wish I could be more helpful." She rose from the table and retrieved several purple velvet bags (containing the Ancient Rune cards) from a glass case near the rear of the class, placed three bags on the girls' table, and placed the remaining four bags on two of the other tables for the other students.

Parvati and Lavender looked at Elizabeth with worried expressions but did not say anything for at that moment a pair or Ravenclaws entered the class, chatting enthusiastically as they took their seats at a table behind the girls.

Elizabeth reached out slowly for her cup but saw only a lump of soggy brown tealeaves at the bottom and the odd clump stuck to the sides. Her inner eye must have gone to sleep.

"Hey," Seamus greeted Elizabeth as he took his seat beside her on the wooden stools at the garden bench they shared with Neville and Hanna Abbott.

"Hey," Elizabeth echoed, smiling back. She forgot all about Professor Trelawney's prediction as she scrutinized Seamus's appearance. "How're you feeling?" She asked.

"I'm fine honey," Dean drawled with a smirk. He'd followed the pair into the greenhouse and sat in Hanna's vacant seat. Seamus grinned.

"Don't you have a free period right now?" Elizabeth demanded, wrinkling her nose at him in a mock sneer.

"Just making sure you're still with us," Dean answered, putting the back of one of his hands to Elizabeth's forehead. "You just had a psycho class, you should be thankful I care so much about your sanity."

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows as Seamus covered his laugh with an exaggerated and obviously fake cough.

"Nah, you're right. I'm just here breathing in the dung." Dean sighed and took in an exaggerated breath. "I miss it so."

"Dean," Elizabeth snapped her fingers in front of his face. "You have Herbology on Wednesday."

"So I do!" Dean's features brightened, "And speaking of Charms class—" Seamus snorted. "—do you have the notes from last class?"

"I wasn't there either," Elizabeth shook her head in disbelief.

"Yeah… but I know Parvati or Lavender would have given you notes… please?" Dean clasped his hands and attempted – but failed miserably – to pout.

"You're lucky she's nice mate," Seamus chuckled as Elizabeth produced the copy of Hermione's immaculate notes from her bag.

"And for that I love her," Dean said and he dashed from the greenhouse, throwing a "Thanks 'Liz!" Over his shoulder as he passed Professor Sprout on his way out.

"That was strangely normal," Seamus stated. Still smiling to himself he took off his robe and stuffed it unceremoniously into his bag.

"Normal would be nice," Elizabeth nodded, her eyes sweeping briefly over a shallow scar on the underside of his arm as he pushed his sleeves past his elbows.

Hanna arrived and took her seat across from Elizabeth She looked uncomfortably across at Seamus. Fortunately, Neville took his seat only a second after her arrival and began talking easily (and animatedly) with Seamus about something that had happened in their Muggle Studies class.

Hanna and Elizabeth quickly copied down the instructions that Professor Sprout had waved onto the chalkboard with her wand, and together they went over to one of the plant benches at the front to try and decide which of the plants they wanted to use for their final project (pairing up as they usually did, they worked well together, they were good friends).

"He's still the same Seamus he was before," Elizabeth said as they stood at the front, examining the little green cacti like plants closely before picking one up to look at closer.

Hanna looked up at the other girl briefly before picking up another plant, inspecting it, and putting it back down. "I know that," she said slowly. "He just seems… different."

"He's only been out of class for eight weeks," Elizabeth pointed out. "That's practically the same as summer break."

"I know, but he's different." Hanna looked calculating as she searched for the word she wanted. "There's something different about his eyes." Elizabeth could tell that she was having a difficult time expressing what she meant without accidentally offending Elizabeth. "Its like…" She paused again, "You remember when Neville came back from the Ministry last year? Right when they all came back? It was like he's aged 10 years in 10 hours? That's how he's changed."

Elizabeth looked over at the two boys who were quickly (and probably considerably incoherently) scribbling down the instructions. Neville had indeed seemed very different when he'd returned the previous year. Before he's left he had been gangly, clumsy and uncoordinated, but in just 24 hours he had matured so much that she almost couldn't recognize her friend.

The same could almost be said for Seamus. A part of her would always see him as the first year who had a knack for setting everything his wand touched on fire, his eyes always off in his own world, ready to cook up some sort of scheme with Dean.

But now, rather than a playful brightness, his eyes seemed to almost be clouded over. Even when he laughed, there was sadness deep in his eyes. It did indeed change his entire appearance from before.

"You're so strong," Hanna said, breaking through Elizabeth's thoughts. "I'd die if I was in your place.

"No you wouldn't," Elizabeth shook her head.

"How can you just…" Hanna shook her head and looked back at the plant she was holding.

Elizabeth waited (her patience had developed greatly of late), looking at her own plant, turning it around before placing it back on the tray.

"How do you do it?" Hanna started over, "How do you keep from going and not letting the world just take over?"

"I honestly couldn't say," Elizabeth said honestly. She picked up a plant that the two agreed on, and they took it back to their spot.

Neville and Seamus had just finished their notes and hurried to the front to pick their plant. Elizabeth mentally noted that Seamus's limp was more pronounced than it had been earlier that morning. Her eyes stayed on him a moment longer and she added to her previous statement.

"What else could I have done? What else can I do, really?" She pulled a measuring tape towards herself and carefully measured the circumference of the plant's trunk. "I could have crawled under a rock or hid or become catatonic," She shook her head and handed Hanna the tape measure, propping her elbows on the bench. Hanna was staring at her, but she continued, her eyes returning to the boys who were poking at a particular plant, "I need him right now just as much as he needs me." She said this with more force than was needed, but it strengthened her reasoning.

"You're _both_ so strong," Hanna sighed, following Elizabeth's gaze as one of the Mimblus Mimbletonia squirted its green slime at one of their other classmate's provocation. Seamus quickly snatched up an empty plant tray for protection but Neville, who was standing right beside him, got a face full. Seamus lowered the tray and upon seeing Neville's green-coated face, let out a loud and genuinely amused laugh.

Elizabeth smiled.


	13. Algiz and the Blank Rune

Chapter Thirteen _Algiz and the Blank Rune_

"Do you want me to come with you?" Elizabeth asked outside the green house. She and Hanna had made some headway in the documentation of their Mimblus Mimbletonia where as Neville had managed to gain a second layer of green slime and Seamus had to rewrite the assignment from Neville's notes as he had used it as a shield.

"I'm only going to the hospital wing," Seamus shook his head, watching Neville trotting off towards the castle to swap his grubby robes before lunch just a moment before turning to Elizabeth and adding with a smirk. "I'm sure I can manage to find it by meself."

Elizabeth nodded as they parted at the castle. So apparently Seamus had noticed that she had employed their friends to keep an eye on him.

She hurried up to her dorm and swapped some books in her bag then went back down to the common room only to hurry up the boys staircase to exchange some of Seamus's books for him. He had double Defense Against the Dark Arts after lunch. Because she had received an Outstanding OWL for that particular class, Elizabeth had a spare period after lunch and Defense practical with Seamus afterward.

She met up with him just outside the hospital wing as he was on his way down the stairs.

"That has to be _the_ most disgusting stuff in the world," Seamus remarked with a small involuntary shudder, reaching for his book bag.

"Lunch then?" Elizabeth suggested brightly, relinquishing his bag and shouldering her own.

"Definitely. _Anything_ to get that taste out of me mouth."

They walked down the vacant stairs, Elizabeth playfully poking fun at Seamus's over excitable plant in Herbology and Seamus halfheartedly defending himself and pushing all the blame on Neville. They emerged into the Entrance Hall to find many students on their way to lunch.

Elizabeth did not notice immediately, but after taking note of Seamus's newly ridged posture, looked at the students they were passing. Almost every person in the Hall was staring at Seamus and the person beside him or her immediately noticeably nudged those who weren't and promptly pointed, quite openly.

Seamus looked awkwardly at the people around him as he picked his way through the crowd, he was not used to attention, especially that sort. He walked closer to Elizabeth and took her hand, walking close to her shoulder. She squeezed his hand back.

"That is _really_ annoying," Seamus said, sitting very close to Elizabeth at the Gyffindor table. She noted that he was angled towards her so completely that he was almost turned to face her on the bench.

I'm sure they'll stop eventually," She reassured, looking around the hall to see that several students had their heads bent together, looking at the pair then quickly away when they saw her eyes on them.

"I sure as hell hope so," Seamus sighed, lifting some pasta onto her plate before serving himself. She saw him subconsciously pull his robe sleeves lower over his wrists as he reached for the pumpkin juice.

May passed quickly and as Elizabeth had predicted, much of the staring had ceased. Seamus began catching up in his classes immediately as he borrowed notes from Elizabeth, Dean, Neville and Hermione. He studied in the library or his dorm at every spare moment he had. His catch up period was shortened considerably with the help of Hermione as she spent more time than usual with the pair. She confided in Elizabeth that she had gotten into an argument with Ron and knew from past experience that it was better to avoid Ron and Harry until the disagreement was forgotten.

By the time their professors had begun seriously impressing upon them the importance of reviewing for exams, Seamus was completely caught up.

During the busy time of helping Seamus and then getting ready for exams, Elizabeth had almost completely forgotten about Professor Trelawney's grave warning. As May ended and exam reviewing became cramming, Elizabeth found herself musing over the tea leaves and what on earth could feel worse than believing that Seamus was lost.

The weekend before the start of exams, as many Gryffindors hurried about the common room to or from study groups, Elizabeth sat in silence beside Seamus on a couch directly in front of the fireplace. They had decided that any studying done on the last two days prior to the exams would constitute as cramming so therefore decided to leave their notes and books in their respective dorms. As Seamus sat staring into the ever merrily crackling fire, Elizabeth's mind wandered to her tealeaves. She had continued with Parvati and Lavender to their early morning tea with the Professor and since that day, both the other girls had expected to see more in Elizabeth's cup, but their obsession appeared to cloud their ability to foresee anything, as; with each session, they yielded no results.

She was now lost in the thought of her year forecast based on the position of the rune cards she'd laid out the previous Thursday in Divination, she was particularly interested in the Blank Rune being beside Algiz in January. She was running through all possible meanings of the particular rune, when Parvati and Lavender approached the pair.

"Hi Seamus, hey Elizabeth," Parvati said, sitting in the armchair next to them. Lavender smiled a greeting and sat on the chair's armrest and turned to Elizabeth with a serious expression.

"Hey," Elizabeth said in a soft voice, looking up at her friends. Seamus nodded, his eyes flickering away from the flames only a moment.

"Elizabeth, me and Lavender were thinking about your tealeaves and your forecast and we were wondering if you had been thinking about what Professor Trelawney had said." Parvati said this quite bluntly; obviously something was on her mind. That grabbed Elizabeth's attention.

"What prediction?" Seamus asked, looking up intently from the fire.

"You haven't told him?" Lavender demanded incredulously.

"I haven't given it much thought…" Elizabeth trailed off.

"What prediction?" Seamus repeated, looking at Elizabeth with surprising interest. He turned to the others when she didn't answer immediately.

"Professor Trelawney foresaw something bad happening to Elizabeth next year." Lavender answered, leaning in and looking pointedly at Seamus.

"She thinks it has to do with you," Parvati said to Seamus, she then turned to Elizabeth. "I still think it's about you. But you still should have told him."

"I forgot-" Elizabeth began but was cut off by Seamus.

"What made you two disagree?" He demanded, sitting up straight and looking between the two.

"Well… Parvati hesitated, looking at Elizabeth. "When we we've been looking at Elizabeth's tealeaves lately we've been keeping notes of what we see."

"Parvati thinks that on Friday she saw a volcano." Lavender explained quickly as Elizabeth's eyes slid from Parvati to her.

"That suggests an impending emotional eruption." Elizabeth mumbled for Seamus's benefit.

"But you think…?" Seamus urged leaning forward slightly, his back moving away from the couch slightly, Elizabeth looked at him. He never showed interest in Divination before aside from joking about it with Dean.

"Well Lavender thinks it was a triangle." Parvati answered.

"Which means good Karma, god knows you could use it." Lavender said. "Which is why I think the warning was about you, cause Elizabeth wouldn't really be getting good Karma if something bad is going to happen to her."

"But I also saw a snake in the cup." Parvati pointed out. "It means an enemy is near by. So I think whatever is going to happen next year has to do with someone in the school. But Lavender thinks it's a broken necklace." At that both Elizabeth and Parvati looked at Lavender. Elizabeth was shocked while Parvati wore an unhappy look.

"What does a broken necklace have to do with me?" Seamus demanded, looking at Lavender.

"Danger in love." Lavender answered. "Which really would be involving you."

"Is that all?" Seamus asked, sinking back into the couch moving inconspicuously closer to Elizabeth.

"Well I saw a flag as well." Lavender said, looking to Parvati with questioning eyes. "And Parvati saw a… raised finger?"

"A raised finger, that's a warning." Elizabeth translated again. "And a flag, that's… danger?"

"Impending danger, yeah." Parvati agreed. "That could go either way we figure. But that's probably what the Professor saw, don't you think."

Elizabeth nodded her head and looked briefly at Seamus who had returned his gaze to the fire.

"Well I think we should go back, look at the rune cards again." Parvati said after looking at Seamus too. "Lavender, maybe you can get Professor Trelawney to show you that black mirror scrying…"

As quickly as the two had arrived they'd gone, discussing the difference between black and silver mirror scrying. Elizabeth hadn't even had time to share her thought of Algiz and the Blank rune with them.

"Are you scared?" Seamus asked in a low voice. Elizabeth looked up at him and saw that though his face was turned towards the fire, he was actually watching her from the corner of his eyes.

"Should I be?" Elizabeth countered.

Not prepared for this answer, Seamus turned to her. "I think so."

"Then I'm terrified." Elizabeth answered honestly.

"Why?"

"Because you're almost as skeptical as Hermione, if you're worried then it can't be good."

"What are you going to do?" Seamus asked, his voice was soft and he slid down on the couch so he was at eye level with Elizabeth. His eyes searched hers', darting from one eye to the other.

"Not let it take over my life and hope it, whatever it is, doesn't happen." She answered, folding her hands in her lap. "Maybe I'll take the Professor's advice and watch who I am around.

Seamus looked down at her hands for a long moment before hesitantly reaching out and taking one of her hands in his. "I'll try not to let anything happen." He squeezed her hand, "I don't _want_ anything to happen to you."

Elizabeth smiled weakly at his obvious urge to protect her but inwardly cringed as dread gripped her stomach with such force that she was certain she would be physically ill from it. She tried to comfort herself with the thought that nothing too horrible could happen to her within the school as long as the professors were there. Surely it could have nothing to do with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, after-all, Professor Dumbledore was there and he was the one person the Dark Lord was afraid of, He would hardly dare send his cronies into the school now.


	14. Getting Worse

Chapter Fourteen _Getting Worse_

As June finally arrived, examination revision became top priority for both the staff and students. Elizabeth found, much to her relief, that her studying was made much easier by the fact that she had helped Seamus catch up in his classes with Hermione and therefore found herself entering the days leading up to the exam period with more confidence than she ever had.

With only a single weekend separating them from the start of exams, a period in which Neville, Dean, Elizabeth and Seamus had decided to do minimum revision; Neville and Dean began to feel restless in the common room so they enticed Elizabeth and Seamus to accompany them out to the grounds as it appeared several other students were doing similar.

Elizabeth sat against a familiar Oak tree that overlooked the lake, Seamus stretched out on the grass at her feet, using the shade from the new spring leaves to block the sun from his face. Dean and Neville were sitting between Seamus and the lake, discussing the specifics of the final Quidditch match while Elizabeth listened with a small smirk; though both had been at the match, they still argued through a play-by-play discussion of all the goals. Elizabeth had played in the game, scoring fourteen and assisting with five of the thirty goals that had won them the Quidditch Cup. Seamus had been at the game, he sat in the stands with Neville and Hermione.

Elizabeth had closed her eyes to the banter, her head against the tree when suddenly the boys fell silent and she opened her eyes. Across the lake from where they sat, Harry and his new girlfriend Ginny Weasley were walking along the waterside. Elizabeth's eyes trailed sadly down to the pair's hands, which were linked as they walked easily in each other's company.

"Things are getting worse, aren't they?" Dean's voice broke her reverie and Elizabeth looked down to where he was looking across the lake. There was no longer anger in his eyes. That emotion, which he had expressed when the pair had first gotten together after the Quidditch match, was completely gone.

"People have started disappearing," Neville agreed with a nod. "Gran said that's how it started last time."

"Mam sent me an owl," Seamus said quietly. Dean and Neville looked back but Seamus looked up at Elizabeth. "She doesn't want me to stay here."

Elizabeth frowned. She knew that Lavena was very protective of her son and that she was eagerly anticipating the summer to have him safe at home, but Elizabeth had no idea that Lavena had anything against the school. Elizabeth always thought it was the safest place for them.

Elizabeth was lost in her thoughts of the pending summer with her muggle parents and didn't even notice the other three talking until her name was called.

"Sorry, what…?"

"What do you think?" Dean asked.

"I think," Elizabeth started, having no clue what they were discussing now and her face reddened, she felt embarrassed. Fortunately Seamus's stomach rumbled to save her. "I think that its time for supper."

Dean seemed to deem that an acceptable response as the group rose, brushed themselves off and started walking to the castle.

"So what do you think?" Seamus asked, slowing to walk back with Elizabeth and dropping his voice so the others didn't hear.

"What was the question?" Elizabeth asked, falling into step with Seamus.

"What did you think about mam's letter?"

"Oh," Elizabeth realized that she hadn't really missed much of the conversation. "I guess she's justified in wanting you close, but there's nothing to really worry about here."

"Speaking of being close…" Seamus whispered, trailing off as he moved closer to Elizabeth, linking her pinkie finger with his own. "You're coming over this summer right?"

Neville glanced back at the pair as the group walked into the Entrance Hall. He guided them to an empty space at the Gryffindor table while maintaining his conversation with Dean.

"As long as nothing changes, your dad's going to pick me up on the Monday after break starts."

"You'll only be at home for a weekend?" Seamus asked, pausing to thank Dean for the plate of pasta he'd been handed. "When will you be going back?"

"Well…" Elizabeth paused, taking a sip of water. "Your mum's due at the end of June, so I'm going to be around to help out for the first month, then I'll have all August at home."

Seamus nodded; speared a noodle with his fork, he popped it into his mouth and chewed slowly with a thoughtful expression.

"You're still helping me tonight with non-verbal Charms, right 'Liz?" Neville asked, capturing Elizabeth's attention as she and Neville started discussing the pros and cons of practicing for a practical exam two days before the examination. Dean and Seamus bent their heads together in a hushed conversation.

&

"I'm not saying that Pentax is the best, I'm just saying that it's what I use," Elizabeth explained to Dean, talking slowly as if she were speaking to a child.

"Nikon," Dean said enthusiastically. "I use a FM2, the picture quality is –"

"I've seen your photos Dean," Neville cut Dean's rant short. "Elizabeth's actually look like something; half the time yours are out of focus or under exposed."

"Thank-you Neville," Elizabeth said appreciatively, smiling at Neville as he sat on the rug in front of the fireplace, practicing his basic banishing charm non-verbally.

Elizabeth sat on the floor, leaning against the side of the armchair Seamus was sitting in. Dean was sprawled out on the couch directly in front of the hearth. Though the weather outside was warming up, it was still nice to have a fire in the cold castle.

"You haven't answered my original question though, 'Liz." Dean turned back to her after sneering at Neville. "Digital or 35mil?"

"I like the idea that you can look at the pictures and decide which to have printed after, saves a lot of film," Elizabeth answered thoughtfully. "But I don't really like how with digital; the images are on the computer, you could easily touch up any flaws. Then –"

"Then it would actually look like Dean has skill?" Neville put in without looking up from a row of paperclips he was making slide across the carpet in three orderly lines, appearing like a military unit of sorts.

Dean was about to open his mouth to retaliate when lower year, Jimmy Peakes stumbled through the portrait hole and into the common room with a roll of parchment clutched in his fist. He rushed over to a back window where Harry was having a disagreement with Hermione. Ron was present but not commenting enough to be part of the discrepancy.

Elizabeth stood up, sat on the arm of Seamus's chair and watched as the boy ran over and handed Harry the parchment before rushing back out the way he'd entered.

"What d'you reckon it is?" Dean asked, he had sat up and was looking inconspicuously over the back of the couch to where Harry was scanning the letter.

"Must be from Dumbledore," Neville said, still sitting on the floor. No sooner had the words left his mouth than Harry left the common through the portrait hole as well.

Elizabeth watched as Ron and Hermione exchanged a couple of words before they moved to a table and sat beside each other, their heads bowed in private conversation. Elizabeth turned back to the others but stayed on the chair's arm.

"I wonder what that was all about," She said, looking down at Seamus who was still watching Ron and Hermione. She stole another quick glance at the pair just in time to see Ron reach his hand out and cup the back of Hermione's neck. He'd pulled her close and pressed a kiss to her lips. Elizabeth looked back to her group with a small frown.

"Whatever it was, its probably top secret, just like everything else he's been doing this year," Neville answered simply, Elizabeth noted a slight edge to his tone and knew that he was a bit upset that Dumbledore's Army had been out of the loop through the year.

They fell silent, Elizabeth sliding back to the floor and resuming her gaze into the fire, she heard Dean and Seamus arguing about something but didn't bother to pay-attention.

Not fifteen minutes had passed since Harry left when he returned at a sprint. He raced up the stairs to the boy's dormitories and Elizabeth looked at Neville with wide eyes.

"Something's not right," Neville said finally looking up from his charms practice.

Harry returned from his dorm, paused in front of Hermione and Ron for only a moment before running out the portrait hole again. Elizabeth rose and was followed immediately by Neville. The two went over to Ron and Hermione who sat in stunned silence, staring at a pair of rolled up socks and a tattered piece of paper that Elizabeth recognized as the Marauder's Map.

"What's going on?" Elizabeth demanded, standing between the pair and looking expectantly at them.

Ron blinked and looked at Hermione questioningly.

Hermione sighed and looked up at Elizabeth with a calculating expression in her eyes.

Elizabeth looked back at Seamus who was still sitting by the fire, his expression anxious. She turned her eyes back on Hermione.

"What do we have to do?" Neville asked.


	15. This Fight

Chapter Fifteen _This Fight_

Elizabeth stood at the end of the corridor beside Seamus. An uncomfortable silence hung over them as Elizabeth tried to think of what had gotten to Seamus.

"_Can't you stay behind?" She asked Seamus as they stood a small distance from Ron, Neville, Dean, Hermione, Ginny and Luna in the Entrance Hall._

"_Why?" He demanded, his eyebrows knitting in confusion._

"_I don't want…" Elizabeth paused, looking down at her hands. "I don't w –"_

"_Nothing's going to happen," Seamus said calmly, placing a reassuring hand on Elizabeth's shoulder._

_Elizabeth looked down at his hand, her skin tingling under his touch. When she raised her eyes to his she saw warmth that had nothing to do with the words he had just spoken, in his eyes._

"_Seamus –" She started_

"_Elizabeth, Seamus, can you two watch the end of the corridor?" Ron asked, looking at them expectantly. _

_Elizabeth frowned as Seamus's hand dropped from her shoulder._

"_Sure," He answered._

Elizabeth shook her head. _That's not it._ She didn't understand; if he wasn't angry with her then what was wrong?

"'Lizabeth,"

Elizabeth looked up to see Seamus inching sideways along the wall until his shoulder was touching hers. She waited for him to speak, her eyes on his.

"A lot…" He paused, looking along the corridor to where Ron, Ginny and Neville were near the entrance to the Room of Requirements. "A lot of things happened to me."

Elizabeth looked at him and wondered if he didn't realize that this was the most obvious thing in the world.

"A lot of things happened," He repeated, taking Elizabeth's hand in his own and gently caressed the back of it with his thumb. "And I'm ready to forget all about them. I'm ready for this fight."

Elizabeth nodded and blinked back tears that rose to her eyes. _He's been through so much and now he's asking for more._ She swallowed and looked down at their hands. She pushed herself from the wall and stood in front of Seamus, her feet fitting neatly between his. She brought her other hand up to hold his.

"I'm –" She started but was cut off by Seamus pulling her towards him, his eyes intent on hers. She vaguely noted him purse his lips slightly – wetting them inconspicuously, a small movement of his she had completely forgotten – as her heartbeat increased in anticipation.

They were just inches apart when without warning the entire corridor was thrown into complete darkness.

With a gasp, Elizabeth took a quick step back, and dropped Seamus's hands. She stared blindly towards where the others were. She could hear footsteps and Ron's cursing.

"Seamus, w –" She was cut off as a hand clamped over her mouth and she was pulled back against something warm.

"Don't speak," Seamus's voice whispered in her ear. Suddenly Elizabeth realized that the warm thing she felt pressing against her entire body from behind was Seamus.

"Sh…" She felt Seamus's soft breath tickling down her collar to her back as he shushed her and his lips as he pressed a kiss to the base of her neck.

Elizabeth's breath caught in her throat, but it had nothing to do with the quick footsteps and murmurs she heard passing just a foot in front of her in the darkness. She felt Seamus's lips move along the back of her neck to just behind her ear, small kisses leaving a trail of goose-bumps in their wake.

"I love you," He whispered before grasping her hand tightly and guiding her through the dark corridor.

She hadn't even noticed his hand had left her mouth.

They stumbled into a lit corridor, followed a second later by Neville, Ron and Ginny.

"What was that?" Seamus demanded; eyes wide, Elizabeth's hand still in his.

"I have no clue," Neville answered, "Where'd they go?"

Ginny shook her head, looking down the corridor then to the left fork, then the right as they stood at a junction. There was no indication that anyone had passed through the area.

Running footfalls caused five wands to be drawn and pointed down the corridor to the right.

"Professor Lupin?" Elizabeth questioned in shock as he, another wizard and a witch entered the junction at a run.

"Which way did they go?" A tawny haired witch demanded.

"We don't know they –" Ginny started but stopped suddenly. "Bill, what're you doing here?"

"Dumbledore sent for us," A tall, youthful wizard answered quickly. Judging by his lengthy red hair pulled back in a ponytail, Elizabeth guessed that he was one of Ginny's older brothers.

"We'll go this way," Neville said loudly, pointing straight down the corridor. "You lot take the left."

The older three continued their run on the course they had been on while Elizabeth joined Ron, Ginny, Neville and Seamus as they ran straight. The darkness in front of the Room of Requirements had skewed her sense direction momentarily, but she realized that they were now headed towards the Entrance Hall.

It was past curfew so when they burst into the Entrance hall all they could hear was their own footsteps.

"There's no one here," Ron gasped in bewilderment, spinning around to look at the rest, confusion in his eyes.

"We went the wrong way," Ginny breathed in exasperation.

"Come on then," Neville waved them to a door in the direction of the dungeons. "Short cut."

They followed Neville towards the Hufflepuff common room until he turned off the corridor to lift a large dusty tapestry so they could all pass under it and up a concealed flight of stairs. "Watch out for the middle step, it vanishes!" Neville called.

The moment she turned the corner into the Astronomy tower corridor, a green jet of light flew past Elizabeth's ear, cracking the stone wall between herself and Seamus.

Neville had evidently taken in the scene before them – in which over a dozen witches and wizards were dueling – and made a decision as he ran after a handful of dark robe clad individuals who were headed towards stairs leading to the Astronomy tower. The moment he reached the first step however; he was thrown backward through the air and landed in a crumpled heap across the floor.

"No!" Elizabeth gasped. Ducking her head, she sprinting across the floor to her fallen friend. She reached him and dropped to her knees beside him just as a large blond haired wizard, clad in black robes fired some bright, white jinx towards them. Elizabeth cast a silent and weak shielding charm, the jinx broke the defense but missed them all the same.

"Neville, are you ok? Say something!" Elizabeth urged, shaking his shoulders slightly.

Neville coughed, his face blanching as he wrapped his arms around his stomach, curling in the fetal position.

"Damn it," Elizabeth cursed, flicking her wand towards an advancing dark haired Death Eater. The jinx hit him directly in the chest and he was thrown backward into another Death Eater.

Elizabeth's eyes scanned the area quickly. Professor Lupin and the tawny haired witch were back to back, fending off their opponents with lightening fast counter curses. Ron was throwing different forms and colours of bright lights at two different advancing Death Eaters, his mouth moving rapidly as he muttered hexes while his sister near by ducked quickly from a jinx cast by the large blond wizard who was still cursing in all directions, before she was forced to dodge a number of curses being thrown at her by a particularly bulbous wizard in dark robes.

Elizabeth saw Draco Malfoy enter the room at a run followed directly by a tall dark haired wizard in billowing black robes before she felt something hit her smartly on the side of her head and she was knocked several feet into a wall.

She heard a distant voice shout what sounded like "– go!" before once again she was plunged into complete darkness.


	16. A Crucial Piece of Information

* * *

Chapter Sixteen _A Crucial Piece of Information_

"Elizabeth," Seamus's voice drifted slowly around her ears, settling in and stirring her senses. She could feel his warm breath washing over her face as she was scooped up and held tight against something very warm. A hand gently brushed back the hair that had come free from her untidy ponytail and – in her fall – had settled on her face. "Wake up… Elizabeth, please –"

"Careful mate, I think she hit her head," Dean's voice came from farther away.

"'Lizbeth come on, talk to me," Seamus's voice sounded desperate as one of his hands traveled to the back of her head and she felt him press his lips quickly to her forehead. "Damn it, wake up."

She felt his breath play across her cheeks and she willed her eyes to open. They wouldn't. It felt to Elizabeth as though she were under water, which was muffling the noises around her and making her eyelids heavy.

"Damn it," Seamus cursed again, his voice reaching her ears with more clarity. "I should have been watching –"

"You were saving your own skin –"

"Elizabeth wake up… please wake up," Seamus cut Dean off, he caressed her face with feather light fingertips.

"She's probably just knocked out," Dean's voice was closer, but was being crowded out by other noises surfacing from the background.

"God damn it," Seamus breathed, his sweet breath rousing Elizabeth. "Fuck, say something Elizabeth."

"You kiss your mother with that mouth?" Elizabeth croaked, reaching her hand out blindly for Seamus, opening her eyes at a squint. When Seamus's face came into focus she reached up to clumsily trace his lips with her index finger.

"Good morning sunshine," Dean sighed in relief and exasperation.

Elizabeth blinked hard and thought for a moment in an attempt to remember.

"Oh god!" She exclaimed. Sitting up suddenly, she was surprised to find the room practically empty except for their group of three and the Muggle Studies teacher, Professor Burbage.

"Oh," Elizabeth gasped, putting her hand to her forehead as blood suddenly rushed to it. Warm arms pulled her back into her semi reclined position and the throb in her head settled.

"Are you alright?" The professor asked, bending over her.

"I'm fine, just a bit of a head rush," Elizabeth said, her eyes were not on the Professor, but instead they were on a pair of watery and extremely concerned blue eyes staring down at her from very close.

"I think she's only bumped her head, we'll take her to our common room… hospital wing's going to be crowded enough tonight," She heard Dean reason.

Professor Burbage surveyed Dean for a moment before her eyes returned to Elizabeth, apparently assessing her condition as best she could. With a quick nod she hurried out of the corridor. Dean moved to the window and leaning against the frame, looked out at the view of the lake it offered.

Elizabeth continued to look up into Seamus's face; she raised her hand again to lightly touch a jagged and relatively deep cut on the side of his cheek. Blood was drying in a sticky red line on his jaw line but he wasn't concerned.

"Did we win?" Elizabeth asked in a whisper.

"Would we be here if we hadn't?" Dean answered from the window.

Elizabeth ran her fingers up and into Seamus's hair, the feel of its soft texture and the fact that he made no objection to her touch caused her body to relax so completely in his arms that it seemed as though she had melted against him.

"I think we should get going before someone comes in here," Elizabeth said, moving slowly to sit up. Seamus kept his arms around her and she realized that he hadn't said anything yet.

Dean came over and helped Elizabeth to her feet. "Are you alright to walk?" He asked uncertainly as she swayed slightly on the spot.

"I think so," Elizabeth nodded, closing her eyes for a second and taking a deep breath. When she opened her eyes the world had stopped spinning and she felt steadier.

"What's that music?" She asked suddenly as the three left the corridor in the direction of Gryffindor Tower. It was the first time Elizabeth had noticed a very lamenting sort of music was drifting all about them, its source seemingly outside as it rose when they neared the windows.

"No idea," Seamus spoke finally, his arms were wrapped securely around Elizabeth's shoulders as she leaned heavily against him. "It started not too long before you woke up."

Elizabeth's head started to spin as they climbed a staircase and she felt Deans hand under her elbow. "You alright?" He asked, throwing a concerned look at Seamus.

Elizabeth nodded, smiling gratefully as they helped her up the stairs.

"What hit me?" Elizabeth asked as they neared the portrait of the Fat Lady.

"_Abstinence_," Seamus muttered as they approached the portrait.

"Still?" The Fat Lady muttered groggily, swinging forward and admitting them to the common room.

"I think it was a really strong impediment curse, but I could be wrong," Seamus explained as they entered the empty common room.

"Where's Neville?" Elizabeth demanded, suddenly alert.

"He's in the hospital wing," Dean explained.

They paused at the bottom of the stairs to the girl's dormitories and Elizabeth looked up at Seamus, tightening her grip on his arm, staring pleadingly into his eyes.

"Come on," Dean sighed, leading the pair towards the stairs to the boy's dormitories.

When they'd finally climbed to the boy's dorm, it was completely vacant. "Ron and Harry are in the hospital wing too," Dean supplied before – despite the late hour – grabbing a towel and heading in the direction of the showers.

Elizabeth critically observed Seamus's face and eyes in an attempt to read his silence as they moved to his bed and slowly sat beside each other. She reached up and again brushed her fingers along the cut on his cheek.

"Someone should look after that," She muttered, leaning towards him to inspect if further. "Was that a curse or a piece of debris?"

"Elizabeth," Seamus whispered his tone slightly chiding with a hint of exasperation. He took her hand from his face and held it in his own before he wordless reached for her shoes and pulling them off he set them on the floor beside his own. He rolled her robes from her shoulders, revealing the plain and now slightly dirt smudged white tank top she was wearing under it. He pulled his hooded sweater over his head, letting it fall to the floor before wrapping his arms around her and slowly lowering them both to the bed.

"How are you feeling?" Seamus asked, caressing the side of Elizabeth's face with a gentle touch. Her stomach lurched as she realized that_ she_ was lying in _his_ arms.

"You're taking care of me," She said sadly. It was not a question.

Seamus nodded and shifted on the bed, moving until he was flush against her with her head resting against his chest.

"How are you feeling?" He asked again, his fingers once again tracing her face.

Elizabeth closed her eyes to his touch and focused on the trail of lightening that followed in the wake of his fingers. "Perfect," She whispered.

"Elizabeth," She felt his breath play across her ear as he whispered but a millimeter away from it. "I want you to sleep now and I'm going to wake you up in a few hours."

Confused, Elizabeth lifted her head and opened her eyes, giving him a puzzled look.

"You were unconscious for about ten – almost fifteen – minutes, you might have a concussion," Seamus explained gently, his hand traveling slowly to the back of her head, caressing her hair carefully. "Its just a precaution."

Elizabeth looked up at him silently for a moment before he pulled her to him, tucking her head under his chin.

"I love you," Seamus whispered, pressing his a kiss to the top of her head.

Elizabeth nodded and rested her forehead against his chest as his fingers slowly traced along her back. Burying her face in his shirt, tears streamed down her cheek.

&

True to his word, Seamus woke Elizabeth at two-hour intervals through the night. Some time in the very early morning, before it was even bright out, he woke her gently earlier than he'd intended.

"Elizabeth… hey, 'Liz, wake up," A new voice roused Elizabeth and she opened her eyes to find Parvati leaning over her.

"Parvati, what's the matter? Wh – why are you dressed like that?" Elizabeth asked, scrambling into a sitting position when she realized that her friend was wearing her travel cloak.

"I have to get going," Parvati explained. From the light of a single lit candle on Seamus's bedside table, Elizabeth could see that the other girl's eyes were red and her cheeks tear streaked.

"What's wrong?" She demanded.

"Sh…" Parvati soothed, sitting on the bed and taking Elizabeth's hands in a reassuring gesture. "Mum's come to collect Padma and me, we're going home early. I promise I'll send you an owl as soon as I'm home and explain everything."

"But P –"

"Sh…" She soothed again. "Go back to sleep, you look like hell." Parvati reached a hand up and carefully pulled the elastic band out of Elizabeth's hair in a sisterly gesture. The long brown locks fell free giving her what Elizabeth was sure was a disheveled look. "Back to sleep," She repeated. "Seamus'll tell you all about it in the morning."

Elizabeth nodded slowly, slightly confused by her friend's sudden departure. She held her arms out and embraced Parvati. "I'll see you this summer," She whispered in her ear.

Elizabeth remained sitting and watched Parvati disappear down the stairs to the common room. _What on earth just happened_?

Elizabeth became suddenly aware of light fingertips on the small of her back. She closed her eyes a moment, reveling in the touch before she turned and lay beside Seamus again.

"What's going on?" She demanded, looking accusingly up at Seamus.

"Sh…"Seamus soothed, pulling her towards him. Elizabeth moved closer to his embrace, but froze when she felt a kiss pressed to her jaw.

"What's the matter?" Seamus asked, pulling back to prop himself up with his elbow and look down at her.

"Are you –" Elizabeth paused and looked up straight into his eyes; searching for any hint of betraying emotions. "Are you alright?"

Seamus smiled a sad smile and brought his hand up to caress her jaw. "I told you I'm ready to forget," He reminded, moving down so Elizabeth could see every detail of his watery blue eyes. Every eyelash.

He kissed her.

It was quick and deliberate. She lay still, knowing that he was testing the waters.

He kissed her again.

Again it was a short and calculated kiss. She felt tears burning behind her eyes as she struggled to push away the feeling of dread that gripped her stomach._What if he never gets over it_?

He kissed her again and she felt it. A familiar feeling. The one that had been dormant for too long.

Her heart began pounding and she broke her stillness, responding carefully to his lips. Seamus pulled back slowly from her mouth and his hand traveled slowly up from her waist to her chest. Laying his palm flat, just lower than her collarbone, a smile spread across his lips and Elizabeth knew that he could feel her heart's reaction.

Seamus leaned over Elizabeth and blew out the candle. "Sh…" He trailed, laying beside her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders.

"I've been getting that a lot tonight," She whispered, melting against his touch.

"Elizabeth," Seamus's voice was completely serious and Elizabeth realized that she was missing a crucial piece of information regarding Parvati's departure. Seamus paused and sighed hard.

Elizabeth waited patiently for over a full minute. "Just say it," She said when she realized that he required prompting.

"Things are going to get really rough around here over the next few days but I promise I'll be right here, I'm not going anywhere," Seamus reassured quickly, picking up a few strands of Elizabeth's hair and playing with them between his fingers.

"Seamus what are you –"

"Dumbledore's dead," He said quietly, tucking the hair behind her ear and pulling her body flush against his own in a tight embrace.


	17. Hope?

* * *

Chapter Seventeen _Hope?_

News spread fast through the school.

Before the professors had the chance to formally notify the students, almost everyone knew that their headmaster had been killed. Professor McGonagall informed the Gryffindors in the early morning as they crowded into the common room that all classes and examinations were postponed. This left some of the students in a confused state.

"What are we suppose to do until the train gets here?" A third year demanded.

"Funeral arrangements are being made, as well all the professors are concerned about your continuing safety. You are to remain at the school until travel arrangements can be made," The professor explained.

"The train'll probably be here early," Elizabeth whispered to Seamus. The pair accompanied by Lavender and Dean were standing near the portrait hole waiting for Professor McGonagall to finish so they could go to down for breakfast. When Elizabeth had gone to her own dormitory early that morning she had found her friend in a state of panic as the other girl had woken up in a vacant dorm after the night's battle.

After she'd addressed a number of other trivial questions, Professor McGonagall turned to the exit, which the foursome climbed out of before her.

"I suppose my mum'll be wanting me home as soon as possible," Lavender said gloomily as she slumped into her seat at the Gryffindor table.

"I don't think my parents will understand much," Elizabeth put in, relieved that her parents wouldn't be worried.

Elizabeth looked around to find that the Great Hall was not as empty as she had expected it to be. Clusters of students sat eating breakfast in tight groups – much like their own – while owls flew in through the high windows, depositing letters. It looked like a normal morning.

A small barn owl dropped a letter in front of Lavender's plate as she was helping herself to a piece of toast. She jumped for it and after reading it quickly she handed the small roll of parchment to Elizabeth with an apologetic expression.

"Mum's coming tonight to get me," She explained to Dean and Seamus. Elizabeth noted that her friend looked put out but also relieved.

They finished their breakfasts in silence and as they stood the decision to go visit Neville was made so they moved to the Entrance Hall.

"Mam?" Seamus spoke softly and Elizabeth looked up questioningly. She stopped in her tracks as her eyes fell on the figure of Seamus's mother walking into the Entrance Hall through the large double oak front doors. One of her hands was at the small of her back, the other supporting her thirty-four week pregnant stomach.

"What're you doing here?" Seamus asked, stopping a few feet from his mother.

Elizabeth noticed Dean and Lavender continue inconspicuously up the marble staircase. Inching closer, but still maintained some distance behind Seamus, Elizabeth could see Lavena's eyes water at the sight of her son and Elizabeth recognized the longing look she saw, knowing how she wished to embrace her son but also the fear at what might happen if she did.

"I'm taking you home," Lavena said shortly and quietly.

"What?" Seamus demanded; his brow furrowed in genuine confusion.

"Seamus please, let's just…" She paused, taking a small step forward. "Lets just get your things and go."

"Wh– no," Seamus said firmly, replacing the distance with a discrete step back.

"Seamus… please," Lavena pleaded. "Don't make this anymore difficult than –"

"No," Seamus's voice had surpassed normal conversation volume, which caused a passing student to stare for a moment before he sped out of the atrium. Seamus took another backward step so he was standing just in front of Elizabeth's shoulder.

"The school isn't safe anymore, we're goin–"

"What d'you mean it's not safe?" Seamus demanded defensively.

"Professor Dumbledore isn't –"

"And what about the other Professors? Do you think they just forgot how to protect us?" Seamus looked angrily at his mother. "Did you forget who brought me back?"

"Seamus pl–" Lavena's voice rose and Elizabeth's heart ached for the woman.

"I can't leave," Seamus cut her off once again. "Now isn't the time to be walking away."

"Seamus," Elizabeth whispered. He turned to her and behind the anger; there was pain and fear in his eyes. "She's just scared. Think about it from her perspective," She paused, trying to ignore his livid expression. "I know you've been through a lot but remember what you said to me? There are other people affected by what happened." Seamus blinked slowly and Elizabeth saw his eyes soften slightly.

Walking around Seamus, Elizabeth went to his mother who had a single tear streaking down her cheek. With some difficulty Elizabeth wrapped her arms around the older woman's neck, kissing her cheek just as she would her own mother.

Lavena sniffled hard and held Elizabeth tightly, burying her face in the youth's shoulder.

They remained in that position for an indefinite number of minutes until Elizabeth felt a hand tenderly caress her hair, then lift Lavena's hand from her shoulder.

"After the funeral," Seamus compromised, his eyes on his feet. He gently pulled her towards himself and – though Elizabeth saw a muscle in his jaw tense – he allowed his mother to hold him.

&

Elizabeth left Lavena and Seamus together in the Great Hall and went to Hogsmeade in search of a room for Lavena. Every inn was full up but she was fortunate enough to convince the landlady of a small house on the same street as Honeydukes to sublet the place for the week at inn rate.

The security on the grounds, contrary to her expectation, was less than they had been all year. Elizabeth was able to pass from Hogwarts to the village and then back to the school without any sort of confrontation. She assumed it was because of the extreme amount of ministry workers and members of the public who were pouring into the area.

Elizabeth finally returned to the school around midday. She went to the Great Hall and found Lavena sitting by herself at the end of the Gryffindor table.

"Where's he gone now?" Elizabeth asked sitting across from the woman.

"You didn't say in your letters that he's still taking potions," Lavena said with only a hint of accusation in her voice. Pouring a goblet of pumpkin juice, she pushed it toward Elizabeth.

Blood rushed to Elizabeth's cheeks and she opened her mouth to apologize but Lavena put her hand up, stopping her with a small sad smile on her lips.

"Its alright," She said then gestured to the juice which Elizabeth took a sip of. "I'd just thought he was finished with them, that's all."

"He will be at the end of the month," Elizabeth reassured, tracing her finger around the rim of the goblet. "I hadn't even thought to mention that in my letters… I guess when you get so used to things…"

Lavena's hand was suddenly on Elizabeth's. She looked up and found the woman smiling warmly. "Thank-you for taking care of my baby."

"I didn't do any–"

"Then I think you and Seamus need to get your stories straight," Lavena cut Elizabeth off and squeezed her hand. An involuntary smile spread across Elizabeth's face.

"Speaking of babies…" Elizabeth grinned. "How's it going?"

"I think it's going to be just like its brother," Lavena answered, rubbing her side with a warm chuckle. "I swear this child never stops kicking!"

"Does it really?" Elizabeth asked with a small sigh in her voice.

"Here," Lavena's face was aglow with a brilliant smile as she reached for Elizabeth's hand. The younger girl leaned across the table as her hand was placed on Lavena's protruding stomach. Almost instantly the queerest sensation reached Elizabeth's palm as something moved.

"Doesn't that hurt?" She asked incredulously sitting back down shocked, at the force she felt behind the movement.

"Not at all," Lavena shook her head and helped herself to some juice. "Seamus was much worse," She paused reflectively and put the pitcher down. "I guess he hasn't really stopped that, has he?"

"He hasn't been like that in weeks, I have no idea why he was so angry," Elizabeth voiced the shock she'd felt at Seamus's reaction to his mother's appearance.

"He said it had to do with a certain promise he made last night," Lavena said with a raised eyebrow.

Elizabeth blushed as she realized what Lavena said. Lavena laughed at her complexion.

"Just be responsible," She said in a warning tone.

Elizabeth chuckled darkly, which caused both Lavena's eyebrows to rise. "Its hard," Elizabeth said slowly. "He doesn't really trust yet."

Lavena's features softened. "Has he told you anything?" She asked in a slightly hopeful tone.

"Only that… ugh," Elizabeth groaned in disgust. "One of them used my DNA in the polyjuice potion. _I_ was hurting him. I didn't put that in the letters either, I guess I just want to forget that part…"

"He knows it wasn't you," Lavena reassured which caused Elizabeth to look up.

"Did he tell you anything?" Elizabeth asked slowly. Her previous want to learn all she could had given way to caution.

"Nothing, I just know."

"How –"

"The way he talks about you," Lavena answered, holding Elizabeth's hand again. "He loves you very much."

Elizabeth swallowed hard and nodded.

"Are you coming back with us then?" Lavena asked, taking her hand back to rub her side again.

"Can I?" Elizabeth asked hopefully.

"We're going to need you," Lavena answered sadly. "I don't really know how this is going to be now with Seamus... Like I said, just be responsible."

Elizabeth didn't blush this time. "Even if the circumstances were different, we're too–"

"Don't say young, I was your age when I was pregnant with Seamus," Lavena said in a slight rush which caused a small blush to form on her cheeks. Elizabeth's jaw opened to retaliate – she had already known this piece of information – but she was cut off. "There was a war, these things just happen. The world is in the same state now as it was then…"

"Contraceptives are more popular now than they were then," Elizabeth said smoothly, a devilish, teasing grin on her lips as Lavena looked up in shock. "What? You were asking for it!"

They both laughed; Lavena's a relieved laugh; Elizabeth's a free one though to her it held a sad undertone.


	18. Scared

* * *

Chapter Eighteen _Scared_

Elizabeth hadn't attended many funerals in her lifetime. The only one she could actually remember was her second uncle on her father's side. It had been a somber event, held inside a bulbous church that she had thought resembled a clay igloo, there had been much black and tears and she had walked between her parents to look into the coffin of the still figure that she had only ever seen in life at weddings and the rare family gathering. After arriving home with her family, she decided that she didn't quite like funerals but was relieved that her parents took it in stride and didn't allow sadness to linger in the home.

This funeral was a startling contrast to the last one. There was black and there were tears, but there was no procession to walk past an open coffin – on the contrary, there was no coffin at all. A large number of chairs were laid out on the school grounds all facing an empty pure white table of sorts. Elizabeth arrived somewhat early with Seamus, Lavena, Dean, Neville and Luna and were fortunate to find seats together as they were quickly filling up with students, ministry workers, members of the public and all manner of humans and creatures alike.

The services commenced with Professor Hagrid walking somberly and tearfully to the white pedestal at the front. In his arms he carried a purple shrouded figure, which – with a suddenly cold feeling overtaking her whole body – Elizabeth realized was the body of her Headmaster. The figure was laid down with intense care and the Professor walked away.

Elizabeth tried her best to remain as attentive as Seamus and his mother were beside her, to follow the words of the short man outlining her Headmaster's life and achievements, but she found her eyes wandering through the crowd instead. There were already many tear streaked faces; men and women, children and adults alike expressed their sorrow in the same manner. Looking back, she saw Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione were sitting just behind her group. Silent tears were rolling steadily down Hermione and Ginny's cheeks. Ron sat with a comforting arm around Hermione, but Harry seemed to be suffering with the same attention issue that Elizabeth was.

As she watched Harry staring out over the lake, she realized that she hardly knew half of what Professor Dumbledore had done for Harry, and yet all the late headmaster had done for her in the past few months could not match it, even to a small fraction. She found a tightness in her chest as she watched a small look of realization dawn on Harry's features and turning her eyes back on the front, she began to find it hard to breathe, her mind's eye replaying the kindness of the old man, his patience and the care he had shown when Seamus – maimed and broken – had been retuned to her.

A weight on her knee made Elizabeth look down to find Seamus's hand – palm up – resting there. She relinquished her grasp on the handkerchief she had been twisting, and threaded her fingers with his. She looked up and saw that his eyes were a watery blue, tormented in anguish and looking back at their linked hands, a thought came suddenly to her that she probably hadn't been the only regular visitor he'd had while in the hospital wing.

Looking back up at Seamus, the sight of a tear falling from his eye was still not enough to cause her own, the only change it brought was that the tightness in her chest increased. Taking her hand back, she wrapped her arm around his back and took his other hand. His muscles tensed for a moment as she applied slight pressure to his back, but he relaxed immediately and leaned into her, his hand coming up to caress the back of her head.

The small man concluded the eulogy and took his seat. Elizabeth jumped suddenly, her reaction mirrored by many others as white flames shot from the pedestal and engulfed the purple shroud. Within seconds, a pure white marble tomb encased her professor and a perfect stillness fell over the grounds, broken only by a number of arrows that flew through the sky from the Forbidden Forest, landing just short of the seats.

The crowd began to thin, a buzz of conversation settling over the area. Feeling Lavena's hand on hers, Elizabeth looked over to find that unlike her own, Lavena's eyes overflowed.

"I guess that's it," Seamus said quietly. Elizabeth looked up and saw two perfectly straight tear streaks down either of his cheeks. Reaching up with her handkerchief still in hand, she gently dabbed at the offending moisture.

They remained seated, each lost in their own thoughts. Elizabeth heard low voices behind herself and after a minute she saw Ginny walk past her and towards the tomb where she paused briefly, touching the pure marble before walking away.

&

Elizabeth was changing slowly into a pair of jeans and a striped polo shirt when Hermione entered their dormitory.

" 'bit empty, isn't it?" Elizabeth asked as Hermione walked past Lavender and Parvati's empty beds before stopping at the foot of Elizabeth's.

"A bit," Hermione nodded. Reaching for Elizabeth's discarded robe, she began to fold it at a snail's pace.

"I'm sorry I'm leaving you here all by yourself," Elizabeth said, looking up from the buckle she was fastening on her jeans to see a Hermione's expression soften slightly. "Something's happening, isn't it?"

"Nothing's happening," Hermione answered quickly but her expression told Elizabeth otherwise.

"Are –"

"Even if I knew," Hermione cut her off with a meaningful look. "I wouldn't be able to tell you." Hermione moved beside Elizabeth, adding the robe to the top of the already packed trunk and sat heavily on the bed. "I really am sorry."

"It's alright," Elizabeth reassured. Sitting beside Hermione, she wrapped an arm around the other's shoulder. They sat in silence for a minute before Elizabeth heard her name called up the staircase. "We're going to miss you," She said, relinquishing her embrace on her friend after a slight squeeze. "Both of us, you've helped us a lot."

"A shame we didn't actually get to _do_ exams," Hermione sighed wistfully. Elizabeth laughed at her.

Shouldering her book bag and carefully lifting her heavy trunk, Elizabeth turned back to Hermione as she reached the door. "Be careful," She warned in a quiet voice.

"You too," Hermione answered with a nod and a sad expression.

* * *

That does it.

That's the end of Why.

Nothing cryptic (well actually there is, but you'd have to be taking university English classes to fully appreciate what's hidden here), not artful like I had started; just the end.

Stay tuned for the sequel!

-MM


End file.
